Stress Management

Yoga, Meditation and Anger Management

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Controlling anger is key to a healthier life style.  Allowing the actions of others to hurt our own mental and physical health can cause stress and disharmony in the body.  Anger management can help oneself find the ability to better acknowledge anger triggers as well as to better cope with the emotional eruption.  Yoga is one way to learn better ways to cope with anger and control emotion. Yoga is easy to learn and a great way to let off frustration and find inner peace.  There are numerous poses in yoga that can aid an individual in dealing with angry emotions.

The article, “Yoga for anger management: 5 poses to break free” by Anujj Trehaan discusses the various poses one can utilize in yoga to combat anger.  She lists numerous poses from Balasana to Sukhusana.  She also encourages Savasana, Matsyasana, and Uttanasana as important poses.  The article explains the purpose of each pose and how the poses help one better cope with anger.  She states,

Yoga can play an important role in anger management, as well as with stress management in one’s daily life and existence.  Various Yoga poses are also directly correlated with managing anger

 

“It is natural to feel anger but not when it starts getting the better of you.Anger is a powerful emotion and probably the only one that hurts us more than it may hurt someone else.If you find yourself in an unbreakable loop of rage and resentment, we have got your back.Go ahead and try these five yoga poses for anger management.”

“Yoga for anger management: 5 poses to break free”. Anujj Trehaan. October 23rd, 2022. NewsBytes.

To read the entire article, please click here

Commentary

When it comes to yoga and anger, there are a few things to consider. For one, anger is often seen as an emotion that needs to be released in order to achieve inner peace. However, yoga teaches us that all emotions should be experienced and then let go of. This can be difficult to do with something as powerful as anger. But if we can learn to experience anger without letting it take over, we can find a balance between the two extremes.

Yoga and meditation can play key roles in reducing stress and anger in life.  They can prevent the sympathetic nervous system from overwhelming the body and keeping the body in a constant state of fight or flight.  It can also help the body find relaxation and reverse it through the para sympathetic nervous system.  This deactivates many of the hormones and the prepare the body for fight or flight and all the emotions that are tied to this response.

Types of Poses for Anger Management

Balasana, also known as child’s pose, is a resting pose in yoga. The word “balasana” comes from the Sanskrit words “bala,” meaning “child,” and “asana,” meaning “pose.” This pose is often used as a resting pose between more active poses, or as a way to release tension and anger. To perform child’s pose, start in a kneeling position with your buttocks resting on your heels.

The Hindi word “suhkusana” can be translated to English as “anger.” This word is often used to describe the feeling of anger that one experiences when they are upset or frustrated. When someone is suhkusana, they may feel like they are about to explode with anger. This feeling can be caused by many different things, such as stress, anxiety, or even just everyday life.  It is of no wonder then why this pose is utilized in anger management.

Savasana, also known as corpse pose, is a posture that is often used in yoga classes. The purpose of savasana is to allow the body and mind to relax and release any tension that has been built up during the practice. Anger is an emotion that is characterized by feelings of frustration, hostility, and/or aggression. It is often triggered by a perceived threat or injustice.

Matsyasana is a yoga asana that helps to release anger. When we are angry, we tend to hold our breath or take shallow breaths. This asana helps to release the tension in the body and allows us to take deep, calming breaths. It also helps to lengthen the spine, which can help to improve our posture and alleviate back pain.

Uttanasana, or “intense stretching pose,” is a yoga asana that is said to be beneficial for anger management. The practice of Uttanasana is said to help release tension and stress from the body, which can often contribute to feelings of anger. In addition, the deep breathing associated with Uttanasana is said to help relax the mind and body, providing a sense of calmness and peace.

Conclusion

In conclusion, yoga is a great way to help manage anger. It can be done in a group setting or at home, and only requires a yoga mat and some comfortable clothing. Yoga can help to focus the mind and body, and release tension that may be causing anger.  If you are feeling angry, there are certain yoga poses that can help you to manage that anger. These poses include the Camel Pose, the Child’s Pose, and the Corpse Pose. By practicing these poses, you can help to calm yourself down and find some inner peace. If you are looking for a way to manage your anger, give yoga a try.

Please also review AIHCP’s program in Anger Management Consulting and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals looking to earn a certification in Anger Management.

AIHCP also offers a program in Meditation Instructor that can help individuals utilize meditation in their daily lives and help teach others.  Obviously Yoga is an important element in meditation and is also discussed. In addition, Yoga also is beneficial in Stress Management and AIHCP also offers a certification for those interested in teaching Stress Management.

All three of these programs are very much integrated and connected in practice and better outcomes with anger and stress.

Additional Resources

“Development and validation of Yoga Module for Anger Management in adolescents”. Alaka ManiTL, etc. al. Complementary Therapies in Medicine Volume 61, September 2021, 102772. Access here

“Yoga for Anger Management: Practice These Yoga Exercises to Control Anger”. Ashish. December 21st, 2021. Fitsri. Access here

“HOW YOGA BENEFITS ANGER MANAGEMENT”. Nicole Anderson. The Strive. Access here

Effective Ways of Managing Your Stress

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

By John Edwards, BS

What is Stress?

Stress is a common issue that people face daily. It can come from work, family, friends, and many other sources. While some stress is normal, too much stress can have negative effects on your health. Managing stress is important to maintain your health and well-being. There are many ways to manage stress, including exercise, relaxation techniques, and talking to someone you trust.

 

Stressed out African American Woman Pulling on her hair.

Commentary:

Defining Stress

When it comes to stress, there is no one-size-fits-all definition. Stress is a unique experience that differs from person to person. However, there are some common themes when it comes to what stresses people out.

For many people, stress is caused by external factors such as work, school, or family obligations. These demands can be overwhelming and lead to feelings of anxiety, worry, and helplessness. Other people may experience stress as a result of internal factors such as chronic illness or insecurity.

No matter the cause, stress can have serious consequences on your physical and mental health. It’s important to find healthy ways to manage your stress in order to avoid these negative effects. Some effective stress management techniques include exercise, relaxation techniques like deep breathing, and journaling.

The Effects of Stress:

Stress is a normal part of life that can either help us or hurt us depending on how we manage it. When stress is managed in positive ways, it can lead to better health, improved productivity, and increased resilience. On the other hand, unmanaged stress can lead to anxiety, depression, and even physical illness.

There are a variety of effective stress management techniques that can help us keep our stress levels in check. We can combat stress in a few different ways such as using relaxation techniques or making lifestyle changes. By taking some time out for ourselves to de-stress on a regular basis, we can minimize the negative effects of stress and live happier, healthier lives.

Managing Stress -Relaxation Techniques:

Whether you’re dealing with the stress of a hectic work schedule or coping with the demands of family life, finding ways to manage your stress is essential for maintaining your health and well-being. While there are many different approaches to managing stress, relaxation techniques can be particularly effective in reducing stress levels and promoting calmness and peace of mind.

There are a variety of different relaxation techniques that you can try, depending on what works best for you. One popular option is progressive muscle relaxation, which involves tensing and relaxing different muscle groups throughout the body. This helps to release tension from the muscles and promote overall relaxation.

Deep breathing exercises are another great way to reduce stress levels and promote relaxation. Simply take a deep breath in through your nose, filling your lungs as much as possible. Then breathe out slowly through your mouth. It helps to mentally imagine your stressor being force out of your body and disappearing into the wind.

Managing Stress – Lifestyle Changes:

Stress management is a very important aspect of our lives. It is necessary to learn how to manage stress in order to maintain our health and well-being. There are many different ways to manage stress, but one of the most important things you can do is to make lifestyle changes.

There are many different factors that can contribute to stress, and it is important to identify what these are in order to make the necessary changes. One of the most important things you can do is to get enough sleep. This will help your body to recover from the day and reduce the amount of stress hormones that are produced.

Exercise is another great way to reduce stress levels. It helps to release endorphins, which have mood-boosting properties. In addition, it can also help to improve your sleep quality. Exercise also allows you to focus your mental energies on something other than what’s bothering you.

When to Seek Help:

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by stress, you’re not alone. Stress is a common problem that can have serious consequences for your health. If you’re struggling to cope with stress, it’s important to get help.

There are many ways to get help for stress. You can talk to your doctor about your stress and how it’s affecting your health. Your doctor can provide support and resources to help you manage your stress. You can also talk to a counselor or therapist about how to better cope with stress.

If you’re experiencing severe stress, you may need medication to help you manage it. Medication can be an effective way to reduce the symptoms of stress and help you feel more in control. If you’re considering medication for stress, talk to your doctor about the risks and benefits.

Conclusion:

In conclusion, stress management is an important tool that can be used in order to improve one’s quality of life. It is important to identify the sources of stress in one’s life and to find healthy coping mechanisms in order to reduce the negative effects of stress. With proper stress management, individuals can improve their overall well-being and find greater success in both their personal and professional lives.

Stress Management Consulting is a growing profession. Mental health care professionals as well as large corporations recognize the need for relaxation not only in professional careers but in private lives as well. If you are interested in learning about becoming certified in stress management then you should visit our Stress Management Consultant certification program webpage – Please Click Here https://aihcp.net/stress-management-consulting-certification/

Additional Resources:

Effects of stress on immune function: the good, the bad, and the beautiful. Dhabhar, F.S. Immunol Res 58, 193–210 (2014).
Access Here 

Effects of stress and mental toughness on burnout and depressive symptoms: A prospective study with
young elite athletes. Markus Gerber, et al. Journal of Science and Medicine in Sport Volume 21, Issue 12, December 2018, Pages 1200-1205
Access Here 

Stress management techniques for students.Kassymova, et al. Proceedings of the International Conference on the Theory and Practice of Personality Formation in Modern Society (ICTPPFMS 2018) PB – Atlantis Press
Access Here 

Swimming as an Exercise Against Stress

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Reversing the damage of stress on our bodies due to daily interaction at work, school or home is important.  Stress management is key but also physical exercise.  Exercise not only can help the body reverse the damages of stress but it can also help the brain function at a more healthy level.  Swimming is one such exercise with multiple benefits due to its very nature of less stress on the joints.  It is a great exercise for the elderly and children but also adults in their prime.  Swimming has numerous benefits in helping the body overcome stress and remain healthy.

The article, “From stress relief to managing depression: 10 ways swimming can do wonders for your mind and body” from Stacker Science and Dolphin Pools takes a closer look at the numerous benefits of swimming and stress and depression reduction.  The article lists ten ways swimming as an exercise benefits the body and mind.  In particular, the article discusses the various systems within the body and how swimming helps them improve in relationship to the mind.  The article states,

Swimming has many physical benefits but also is beneficial in reducing stress and depression in all age ranges and persons

 

“Physical activity strengthens your cardiovascular and musculoskeletal systems and can improve your mood, and relieve depression. It also boosts the quality of your sleep, increasing energy levels. Those who exercise regularly have a reduced risk of common cancers, including breast and colon cancer. Swimming provides the benefits of physical activity while putting less stress on your joints. This activity works your major muscle groups, and because it is a low-impact form of exercise, those with arthritis or joint pain may want to make swimming their workout of choice. ”

“From stress relief to managing depression: 10 ways swimming can do wonders for your mind and body”  Stacker Science/Dolphin Pools. Oct 8th, 2022.

To read the entire article, please click here

Commentary

Swimming is an excellent form of exercise that provides many benefits for the body and mind. It is a low-impact activity that can be enjoyed by people of all ages and abilities. Swimming is a great way to improve cardiovascular fitness, increase muscle strength and flexibility, and improve joint mobility. It is also an excellent way to reduce stress and promote relaxation.  Swimming is an excellent form of exercise for a number of reasons. First, it is a low-impact activity, meaning that it is easy on the joints and muscles. This makes it ideal for people who are looking for a gentle workout. Second, swimming is a great cardio workout. It gets the heart pumping and the blood flowing, which is great for overall cardiovascular health. Third, swimming is a full-body workout.

Swimming and Stress Reduction

Swimming has long been touted as a means of stress reduction, and for good reason. A few laps in the pool can help to clear your head and relax your body, both of which are essential for reducing stress levels. In addition, the rhythmic nature of swimming can help to lull you into a meditative state, which is also beneficial for stress reduction.   One of the ways it does this is by releasing endorphins, which are hormones that have a natural calming effect. Swimming also helps to lower blood pressure and heart rate, both of which can contribute to feeling less stressed. Additionally, the act of swimming can help to clear your mind and focus your thoughts, which can also lead to reduced stress levels.

Swimming is a great way to get your heart rate up and to improve your cardiovascular health, but did you know that it can also be beneficial for your brain? When you swim, your body releases endorphins, which have been shown to improve mood, increase feelings of well-being, and reduce stress and anxiety. In addition, the act of swimming can help to increase neurogenesis, or the growth of new brain cells.  In this way, it is also extremely beneficial to stress reduction, anxiety or depression.

Making swimming part of your overall exercise routine is an excellent idea especially for those who have a more difficult time running.  It is also a great social opportunity for children to meet others and learn an important life skill.

Conclusion

In conclusion, swimming is a great way to improve your health. It is low-impact and can be done at any age or fitness level. Swimming is also a great way to relieve stress and relax.  swimming is a great way to reduce stress. It is a low-impact activity that can be done by people of all ages and abilities. Swimming is also a great way to get exercise and improve your overall health. So, if you’re looking for a way to reduce stress and improve your health, swimming is a great option.  So, what are you waiting for? Go take a dip!
Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Stress Management.  After completing the required courses, one can apply for certification.  AIHCP has offered the Stress Management Certification for over 20 years and it can be utilized anywhere in the country to enhance a professionals resume.
Stress Management is an important way to manage stress and swimming is just one of many ways to help manage it.  One should take the time, if they have not, to learn how to swim, or if one already knows how to swim, to take advantage of its many benefits.
Additional Resources
“Swim Stress Away: 5 Mental Health Benefits Of Swimming”. Claire McDaniel. May 13th, 2015. Clear Comfort. Access here
“How Swimming Can Help Improve Mental Health (Or Ease Stress)”. Riley Dunn. December 21st, 2021. Swimming World. Access here
“Six ways swimming benefits your mental wellbeing”. Samantha Wild. 26 October 2021. Bupa.  Access here
“The Effect of Swimming on Anxiety-Like Behaviors and Corticosterone in Stressed and Unstressed Rats”. Mohammad Amin Safari,etc, al.  Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2020 Sep; 17(18): 6675.  Access here

 

Good and Bad Stress

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Stress can be good and bad.  Stress that overwhelms and ferments within the soul is bad.   It builds up within the body and releases the fight or flight response which in the moment may be good but over time can become detrimental to health.  Stress however that pushes one forward to meet challenges in the moment can be a benefit.  It ultimately depends how the body responds to certain stress and how long the stressors remain.  Learning to identify good and bad stress is very important in all aspects of life.

 

There are many forms of good and bad stress. Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program

The article, “Why Stress Is Like Debt And How To Harness Its Productive Power” by Noah Mishkin takes an interesting approach at viewing stress and how one can better distinguish between good and bad stress.   In many ways stressors can help one identify issues that need resolved immediately while other stressors can anchor and bog one down in one’s daily work.  Bad stress is what needs to be limited and contained.  He states,

“The onset of stress can happen in an instant, leaving entrepreneurs figuratively paralyzed and unable to function adequately or cope heartily. Stress can also creep up in small, unnoticeable doses, accumulating over time, until the moment you realize how completely overwhelmed you’ve become, making it harder to take control.”

“Why Stress Is Like Debt And How To Harness Its Productive Power”. Noah Mishkin. Forbes. September 27th, 2022.   To read the entire article, please click here

Commentary

Reacting and coping with stress is an important part of business and life itself.  It is critical to face stressors but when one cannot it is best to try to let things go so the body does not remain in a state of unresolved energy.  How one faces stress is key.

Stress Itself

Stress is a normal physical and mental response to the demands of life. A small amount of stress can be good, motivating us to meet deadlines and achieve goals. However, too much stress can have negative effects on our health, including high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity and anxiety. Stress can also lead to poor decision-making, decreased productivity and absenteeism from work or school. Managing stress is important for our overall well-being.

Stressors are any type of demand placed on an individual. The body reacts to stressors by releasing hormones, such as cortisol, which help the individual cope with the demand. If the demand is chronic, or long-lasting, it can lead to health problems, such as high blood pressure and heart disease.

Good Stress

There are two types of stress: good stress and bad stress. Good stress, also known as eustress, is the type of stress that motivates you to accomplish a task. It’s the kind of stress that keeps you alert and focused. Bad stress, on the other hand, is the type of stress that impedes your ability to think clearly and function properly. It’s the kind of stress that leads to anxiety and depression.

There is a growing body of research that suggests that certain types of stress can actually be beneficial for individuals. These are typically referred to as “good” stressors or “positive” stressors. Good stressors generally involve some type of challenge or opportunity for growth, and they often lead to increased levels of motivation and productivity. While too much stress can obviously be detrimental, a moderate amount of good stress can actually help people reach their full potential.

Some stress in business is actually good and can lead to healthy outcomes. Good stress, or eustress, can stimulate people and help them be more productive. It can also help motivate employees and make them feel more invested in their work. In some cases, a little bit of stress can actually be beneficial.

Bad Stress

The term “bad stress” is typically used to describe a negative psychological state brought on by exposure to a stressful situation. This can include feeling overwhelmed, anxious, hopeless, or even panicked. Bad stress can lead to physical health problems like high blood pressure, heart disease, and stroke. It can also make it difficult to concentrate, make decisions, or even think clearly.

Bad stress in business refers to the negative impacts that stress can have on businesses, such as decreased productivity, employee absenteeism, and increased health care costs. Stress can also lead to more serious problems such as employee turnover, legal issues, and financial problems. While some stress is inevitable in any business, it is important to try to minimize bad stress by creating a positive work environment, providing adequate resources and support, and communicating effectively with employees.

Conclusion

In conclusion, stress is not all bad. A certain amount of stress can be helpful in getting us motivated to meet a deadline or achieve a goal. The key is to manage our stress levels so that we don’t become overwhelmed. When we are able to do this, we can harness the power of stress to help us reach our potential.  Also in doing, so especially in the business sphere, one can better deal with challenges and problems in a productive way instead of allowing stress to derail company work.  Stress is a big problem in business and through better stress management skills can be lowered among employees.  It is hence important to identify good and bad stressors in life and deal accordingly with them.

 

Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Stress Management Consulting.  The program consists of online CE courses that lead to the four year certification.

 

Additional Resources

“Good stress, bad stress”.  Firdaus Dhabhar, PhD.  Stanford Medicine News Center. December 21st, 2012. Access here

“Why Stress Is Both Good and Bad”. Angela Grippo Ph.D. Psychology Today. January 20th, 2016.  Access here

“Good Stress, Bad Stress—The Delicate Balance in the Vasculature”. Kirstin Wingler and Harald H. H. W. Schmidt. Dtsch Arztebl Int Oct 2009. Access here

“The History of Stress” Mariana Bockarova, Ph.D. Psychology Today. December 29th, 2021. Access here

 

Stress Management Consulting Program Video on Anxiety

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Anxiety is a constant source of stress like symptoms but without an actual stressor present.  Anxiety persists beyond the stressor and can sometimes be due to no stressor at all.  Anxiety can be a response also to past trauma that leaves the person in a constant state of fight or flight.  Obviously anxiety can cause numerous health issues putting the body constantly on red alert and be damaging to forming social bonds with other people.

Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Program, as well as its Crisis Intervention Program and see if the programs meet your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Stress or Crisis Management.

Meditation Instructor Certification Blog on 4-7-8 Breathing

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Breathing is life itself in the East.  Each breath is critical to existence and plays an important role in balance.  In meditation, proper breathing is critical.  Proper breathing can reduce anxiety and stress and return the body to a sense of calm.  This is why breath work is an essential element in the meditative process.  With proper breathing, one can find a balance with self and life and ease away from the loud noise of the temporal world.  Please also review AIHCP’s Meditation Instructor Certification

4-7-8 breathing is an excellent breathing technique to utilize. Please also review AIHCP’s Meditation Instructor Program

 

The article, “How To Do the 4-7-8 Breathing Exercise” from Cleveland Clinic’s healthessentials looks closer at the 4-7-8 Breathing exercise and how it can benefit someone.  The article states,

“The 4-7-8 breathing technique is a style of intentional breathwork that can calm your mind and body. Though popularized in 2015 by integrative medicine specialist Andrew Weil, MD, it has ancient roots in the yogic practice of pranayama, or focusing on the breath.”

To read the entire article, please click here

Please also review AIHCP’s Meditation Instructor Certification as well as AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Certification and see if they meet your academic and professional standards.  The programs are both online, independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Meditation or Stress training.

Stress Management Consulting Program Blog on Lowering Cortisol

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Cortisol is released into the body during times of stress.  This short term boost to the body is useful but over long periods of time it can damage the body.  It is important to reduce cortisol output by managing stress and eating properly.  Stress Management is key in keeping the body’s response systems in control.  Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program

The article, “Your 5-Minute Read on Lowering Your Cortisol Levels” from healthline takes a closer look on how to monitor and lower cortisol levels.  The article states,

 

“While cortisol is essential for a variety of functions in the body — including regulating the stress response — consistently high cortisol levels due to chronic stress can lead to health issues. Taking steps to manage your stress levels and maintaining healthy habits like eating a well-balanced diet, exercising, and getting enough sleep, are some things that may help. If you’re experiencing persistent health issues or chronic stress and nothing seems to help, it may be a good idea to talk with a medical professional about your symptoms.”

To read the entire article, please click here

Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Stress Management Consulting.

 

Stress management can help lower cortisol levels. Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program

 

Stress Management Video on PTSD Part III

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

PTSD is unprocessed trauma due to a horrific event.  Learning to finally face that trauma and move forward is an important step.  Learning to process and again learn to trust and have productive relationships are important.  Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.

 

 

Please review the video below

Stress Management Consulting Video on PTSD Part 2

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is caused by a severe trauma that continues to haunt and trigger the past emotion as present.  It is unfragmented elements of a moment so bad that it is not fully processed into long term memory.  Therapy helps properly process this material to long term memory so it can be properly understand by the person as the past.  One still lives with the scars of the past but are able to in a healthy way process and understand it.

Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Certification and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Stress Management Training

Grief Counseling Program Blog on Trauma and Restoring Intimacy

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Sexuality and intimacy are crucial aspects of human life.  It allows two to bond and share the deepest feelings with a wholesome sexual experience.  An experience that is pure and filled with love as opposed as corrupt and full of hate.  During trauma, individuals can lose intimacy and a healthy understanding of love and sex.  This can create obstacles to fully reacclimating into society because one is not able to form a new bond or attachment with another human being.  The act of intimacy and the act of sex in themselves can also become triggers and reminders of past abuse and push the person away from these normal and healthy bonds.  Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Program

One who has experienced trauma must eventually face intimacy, trust and friendship and if desired, a more deeper friendship in the contract of a sexual relationship.  Unfortunately, trauma makes this difficult and can prevent the person from an important fountain of healing that can bring the person closer to becoming one again.  In this article, we will look at a few issues of intimacy and sexuality that someone who has faced trauma will deal with and how that someone can learn to trust and love again.  Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Courses

In intimacy, one opens oneself to another.  This can mean many things to a survivor of sexual trauma or betrayal.  One feels the loss of a control.  In isolation, one feels one has the power to control what occurs and the fear of opening oneself, puts oneself partly at the power of another.  It is exactly this power that a trauma survivor fears.  In addition, trauma survivors fear abandonment.  If one opens up, then one risks the chance of being hurt and betrayed again.  Hence many experience abandonment issues.   Intimacy also opens up the chance of rejection.  Trauma survivors fear the thought of being rejected for who they are and may very well reject someone before they can be rejected.

It is important with intimacy to accept fears.  This is the hardest part, but only until one dismisses the fears, can one again learn to have a trusting relationship.   The fear may be in the other person, or in one’s own tendencies but one cannot have the healing powers of intimacy without trust and letting fears go.  One also needs to reject ideas and notions that can block intimacy with others.  Many who have been traumatized universally label everyone.  All men/women are bad is a common over generalization.  The perpetrator was not good but not all people are bad.  This central concept can take time to finally become a reality again. Other false narratives include assuming no one has every experienced what one has experienced, or that one cannot ever burden another with one’s issues.  In addition, others feel unloved and if anyone ever knew what occurred, then that person would no longer be lovable.  Flaws are seen as more prominent and as a sign of weakness, when in reality everyone has flaws.

It can be difficult after trauma to again show intimacy and open oneself up. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Program

 

Learning how to discuss the past and discuss the future are critical communication skills.  Individuals who fear intimacy need to be better able to express to another and share how to handle issues and conflicts.  Without releasing the fear, false notions and opening up communication, then a person suffering from trauma will not be able to open again and find the value and healing within a friendship or a deeper relationship.

One of the biggest blocks to a deeper relationship is again seeing sexuality as wholesome and natural.  Sex in its very nature promotes union, trust, and love but the trauma has distorted the true value of intimacy and sexuality.  Following an assault, sex itself can become a trigger to a PSTD response.  A certain touch can remind one of the trauma and turn something of love into something of abuse.  The person has a hard time viewing sex as holy and the person as sacred.  The rape or assault has stripped sexuality and intimacy of its dignity and the person has difficult times again experiencing these feelings and senses in a positive way.

Sex can also be seen as a way to control others, or it may be a device to fix what went wrong before.  Unhealthy expressions and sexual behavior can result in different directions from fear of sex to promiscuity later in life.  It is hence important to remove these past negative images.  One image that is especially unhealthy is seeing all sexual behavior and correlating it with a sense of disgust.  It is important to learn skills to neutralize this feeling of disgust and help re-evaluate these past negative experiences with positive experiences.

In rebuilding oneself for intimacy and sexual relations, the traumatized need to overcome many hurdles of trust and intimacy but certain steps can help to start the healing process.  Disgust and association with trauma can be overcame with patience and time and understanding from one’s new partner.

It is hence important to again see certain parts of the body as holy and good.  They cannot be seen or associated as evil in themselves.  The action must be separated from the part of the body itself.  Second, one needs to learn neutralize disgust.  Ideas that the body is an object to be used must be dismissed and replaced with ideals that the body is a temple and a gift.  This not only deals with the other person, but also how one views oneself.  One can further separate the feeling of disgust with sex itself and shame.   The shame with trauma needs to be separated from the act itself.  By learning to separate negative feelings and events from the body and act itself, one can better open up to others.  One can then create a new narrative where the event with a different person is not hateful or abusive but instead filled with love and respect.

Unfortunately, while rebuilding each other, partners should be conscious of others past.  Certain boundaries may initially needed and a slow crawl until mutual comfort is met.  Flashbacks can occur and it is important to recreate intimacy and the sexual experience together to form new wholesome memories.  This requires patience, counseling as well as awareness.

Healthy sexuality is the ultimate key.  While intimacy does not necessarily involve sexuality, nor the necessity of entering into a sexual relationship, one must still restore a sense of the sacred to the sexual act.  Sex is not about control, secretive, shameful, wrong, abusive, dis-connective, controlling, superficial, or selfish but instead is a spiritual, emotional and physical act that binds.  It builds self esteem and gives proper pleasures associated with that.  It is celebrated and gives deeper meaning to life.  It does not abuse, but promotes a feeling of unity and safety.  It honors and loves and builds two instead of breaking down another. Finally, it does not reject, but it also accepts the imperfect and celebrates the two.

For some, sex is more than naturally just beautiful but also sacred from a religious view.  Sex in this regard binds two as one before God and calls forward a vocation that goes beyond the symbolic act of sex, but carries itself in all matters of life itself.  Spiritually, the destruction of sex to anything less is not of God and is a misuse of this divine gift to not only bring forth new life but also unify two into one.

Restoring intimacy with a victim of abuse can take time and patience but it can again reveal the goodness of intimacy and love

 

One can restore intimacy, and if desired, a healthy sexuality after assault, but naturally, the traumatized must learn to reprogram one’s mind to not only not fear but to open up and let go past narratives that prevent the leap of love and faith.  The traumatized must also learn differentiate the corruption of the perpetrator from the holiness and goodness of the action itself and how it can be experienced with a good person.

It is a most disgusting sin to harm another through sex because it injures the person not only physically but also emotionally.  It affects one’s ability to feel intimacy again and feel trust.  It is more than a theft of virginity or physical freedom, but is a theft of self, but fortunately, through healing, counseling and prayer, one can again heal.

Please also review AIHCP’s Crisis Intervention Certification, Stress Management Consulting Program as well as AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification Program.  The programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in these disciplines.

 

 

Source: “The Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook: A Guide to Healing, Recovery and Growth” by Glenn R Schiraldi, PhD

PTSD from the Mayo Clinic

PTSD from the National Institute of Mental Health

When PTSD and Intimacy Collide: What Really Happens? By Tia Hollowood

Understanding Intimacy Avoidance in PTSD by Annie Tanasugarn Ph.D., CCTSA