What to Know When Becoming a Nurse Practitioner

Friendly and attractive of a woman practitioner standing in a glass hall office of the clinic and examining documentsWritten by Victoria Maxwell

Becoming a nurse practitioner (NP) is a rewarding and challenging journey. NPs are advanced practice nurses who provide a wide range of healthcare services, including diagnosing and treating medical conditions. If you’re considering a career as a nurse practitioner, it’s essential to be well-informed about the path you’ll need to follow. This guide will provide valuable insights and information on what to know when becoming a nurse practitioner.

1. Educational Requirements

Becoming a nurse practitioner requires extensive and challenging schooling. It usually begins with a Bachelor of Science in Nursing (BSN) or comparable degree, which teaches nursing fundamentals. After getting an RN license, you can pursue higher study, such as an MSN or DNP. Aspiring nurse practitioners get specific clinical training from these postgraduate degrees. The program emphasizes advanced clinical practice, specialization, and preparing students for larger patient care and healthcare leadership positions. Becoming a nurse practitioner requires effort, knowledge, and a desire to improve patient care.

2. Specialization and Certification

Nurse practitioners often specialize in family practice, pediatrics, adult gerontology, women’s health, and more. After completing their school, they must get specialist certification. Reputable organizations like the American Academy of Nurse Practitioners (AANP) and the American Nurses Credentialing Center provide certification. These organizations set and enforce nurse practitioner standards, ensuring they have the skills and knowledge to succeed in their industry. Specialization certification boosts a nurse practitioner’s reputation and validates their expertise in their field. It also shows their dedication to providing high-quality care to patients.

3. Licensing and State Regulations

Nurse practitioner licensing standards vary by state or nation. Understanding local legislation and licensing requirements is crucial. Some states allow nurse practitioners to work independently and offer patient care. Other states require nurse practitioners to collaborate with doctors under collaborative practice agreements. Understanding and meeting license requirements is crucial for legal compliance, practice scope, independence, and patient care as a nurse practitioner.

4. Clinical Training and Residency

Clinical training gives nurse practitioners excellent hands-on experience to develop their specialization-specific abilities. Nurse practitioners gain practical knowledge and skills throughout their studies to succeed in their careers. Some nurse practitioners choose postgraduate residencies or fellowships to improve their clinical skills. These extra training possibilities help nurse practitioners flourish in their healthcare professions by deepening their knowledge and skills in their field. They can become leaders and specialists in their disciplines by improving their clinical abilities via postgraduate residencies and fellowships.

5. Prescriptive Authority

Nurse practitioners can prescribe drugs in most states, although their authority varies. Nurse practitioners must comprehend the laws and regulations that allow them to prescribe pharmaceuticals, including prohibited substances, in their practice region. It is important to know your state’s prescriptive authority legislation since it determines its reach. Nurse practitioners can offer patients the right drugs and restricted substances within their licensure and meet the highest standards of patient care and safety by being aware of these legal limits.

6. Continuing Education and Recertification

Lifelong learning is essential for nurse practitioners. Healthcare is always changing. Therefore, continual education and recertification are essential. Nurse practitioners must commit to continued professional development to stay current on healthcare trends and best practices, according to most certification organizations. Learning is a professional commitment and a way to provide high-quality patient care. Nurse practitioners can maintain their accreditation and function as critical healthcare professionals in the changing healthcare environment by maintaining their education and recertification.

7. Collaborative Practice or Independent Practice

One significant decision to make when considering a career as a Nurse Practitioner is whether to pursue a collaborative practice or an independent practice. This choice can impact the nature of your role and the type of healthcare facility where you’ll work. Nurse practitioners often have a range of opportunities, with nurse practitioner jobs available in collaborative settings within hospitals, clinics, and medical practices, as well as the option to operate independently in certain states. Each path has its advantages, and the decision should align with your career goals and the level of autonomy you desire. Whether you opt for a collaborative practice or an independent one, the demand for nurse practitioners is on the rise, offering a promising and rewarding career in the healthcare field.

Conclusion

Becoming a nurse practitioner is a significant commitment involving education, specialization, certification, licensing, and ongoing professional development. As advanced practice nurses, NPs play a crucial role in healthcare delivery, providing primary and specialized care to diverse patient populations. Understanding the educational, regulatory, and professional aspects of the nurse practitioner role is essential for a successful and fulfilling career in healthcare.

 

Author Bio:

Victoria Maxwell is an aspiring author residing in New Hampshire. When not writing, she loves hiking in the White Mountains and learning about all things backpacking.

 

 

Please also review AIHCP’s Case Management Certificate program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  These programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification.

Toxic Positivity and Grief Counseling

Those who enter into the human service fields quickly learn that helping individuals is not about necessarily fixing them but more so guiding them and walking with them.  It would be so nice to be able to magically make the hurt go away or the problem vanish but the reality is problems never go away in life.  Life is about coping and overcoming issues and learning to live with them. So when someone appears with a fix it all approach to life, then that particular someone should be avoided or at least not enter into the helping fields.

Toxic Positivity ignores the painful reality and prevents healing.

 

Individuals who think a phrase or few words can make someone forget the love of their life, or something extremely important obviously have not loss anything important yet.  Sometimes life teaches the hard lessons for those even in the helping professions.  Many times, the solution is listening and sojourning, perhaps even offering a few coping strategies, but never is their a solution or a fix to loss or pain in life.  When something bad happens, the loss of a family member, the loss of a job, or the loss of a pet, the pain is real.  The pain is real because what is lost mattered.  No words can fix that except a return to the pre-loss state.  In this world, there is no return to the pre-loss state, so one must learn to cope and adjust to the loss.  Those in the helping fields, counseling, human services and social work understand that listening, offering solicited advice and sojourning are how one performs one’s professional duty.

When one tries to fix, then one ultimately misses the importance of the loss.  When one tries to fix, one obviously has never lost anything oneself.  Hence any short cuts or attempts to lessen the loss or invoke recovery goes against the healing process of grief itself.  Many well intentioned individuals offer a plentitude of sayings or quotes to help fix, but these rarely help.  Professionals know, or at least should know, that there is no magic word to heal loss itself.

One of the quick fixes that many employ is toxic positivity.  This type of attitude is toxic because it is not real and does more damage to the griever or mourner.  Instead it insults the loss, insults the pain, and ignores the reality.  It hopes to make the situation lighter or less extreme but by doing so it becomes a lie.  This type of lie stunts healing growth and disenfranchises the loss of the griever.  Many times, “grief bullies” a term used in our blogs below, will attempt to enforce a false and toxic positivity  or spin on a loss and become irritated when a mourner refuses to accept the silver lining.  Hence it is important to identify what toxic positivity is, correct those who utilize it and remove it from anyone’s practice in grief counseling.

The article, “What Is Toxic Positivity?” by Chloe Carmichael looks the problems of toxic positivity not so just from the point of the griever but also the person who may employ it for one’s own life views.  She states,

“Toxic positivity can sound like a confusing phrase at first: After all, positivity is supposed to be positive, right? However, just like even something as innocent and healthy-sounding as jogging can become toxic if taken to an extreme, so can positivity. Taken to an extreme, positivity becomes toxic and deprives us of the motivation to make healthy changes that the awareness of a negative, uncomfortable reality would otherwise stimulate us to make”

“What Is Toxic Positivity?”. Carmichael, C. (2021). Psychology Today

To access the full article, please click here

Commentary

When individuals utilize toxic positivity they do so to protect themselves from hurt and pain.  They do not wish to face the issue at hand so they attempt to silver coat everything.  In doing so, they lose the true reality of life.  They create a false veil of happiness.  This silver lining attitude is not only false to the life narrative but can have harmful effects on the grieving process.  In other cases, individuals may fear to face conflict, or wish to minimize discomfort because they do not wish to offend another person.  This keeps many individuals in unhealthy relationships as they create alternative realities not anchored in reality. Many would rather exist in a false reality without conflict or anger.  They see anger or emotion as something to be avoided at all costs, even to the point of giving up one’s own happiness.

Many who exhibit toxic positivity ignore “bad” feelings, confrontation, or hope to put a false spin on something bad to protect feelings

 

Those who are trapped in this attitude need reminded gently that it is OK to be true to oneself.  It is OK to sometimes express anger, or grief.  In fact it is healthy to express these feelings and part of being a human being.  Those who resort to avoidance or creating a false narrative harm themselves and also keep themselves trapped in horrible relationships and situations.  Individuals need told they can express themselves but also need to be shown sometimes the reality and ugliness of human life and to accept it.  By accepting it, one can finally move forward and find true solutions.  If the truth is ignored with false positivity, then the problem will never receive the solution it needs.

Again, there are those who are not only victims of their own toxic positivity, but also victims of others hoping to impose their narratives on them.  Individuals who try to cheer others up with pithy sayings when individuals are grieving are sharing a form of toxic positivity.   The famous saying to make lemonaide when life gives you lemons is healthy advice, but if given in the acute and intense moment of grief, then it is very toxic.  It ignores the “lemons”.  It is important to acknowledge the “lemons” before one can heal.  Others may remark that negativity only begets negativity, but they forget that sometimes one must first acknowledge the negativity before one can heal from it and find positivity.  Imposing positivity too soon can be harmful to one’s healing process. Instead of trying to fix or present solutions, simply acknowledge the loss and listen.  This is more helpful in the overall healing to a person than trying to fix them with an imposed positivity that is way too soon to help someone heal.

Hence while, “at least he or she…” or “he or she is in a better place” type comments are well intended, they can cause more damage than good.  Avoid bully phrases as “good vibes only”, “it could be worse”, or “things happen for a reason” and replace them with ” I am here”, “bad things happen and how can I help”, or ” This must really be hard”.

Conclusion

Positivity is important in life but when it is forced to ignore reality or an issue it can be detrimental.  Whether one is trying to sell it or buys it, it needs to be properly utilized.  When in acute pain or in a bad situation, it is OK to be sad or mad and it is definitely OK to focus on it.  Positive spins on bad situations are not needed when true solutions of facing the issue is needed.\

It is best to acknowledge the bad and the good truthfully in life. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification

 

Please also review AICHP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification.

As certified grief counselors or anyone in the human service field, remember to be there not to fix a loss but to help one through it via acknowledgement and listening.

Additional Resources

“Toxic Positivity—Why It’s Harmful and What to Say Instead”. Cherry, K.  (2023). VeryWellMind.  Access here

“Toxic Positivity: Definition, Examples And What To Say Instead”. Mona, B. Forbes Health.  Access here

“What to know about toxic positivity”. Villines, Z.  (2021). Medical News Today.  Access here

“How Positivity Can Turn Toxic”. Davis, T. (2022).  Psychology Today.  Access here

 

 

Intermittent Explosive Disorder and Anger Video

Anger comes and goes and is natural, but when it becomes a force that is uncontrollable and leads to social and criminal issues, then it needs reviewed.  While no excuses can ever be made, there are cases where extreme anger can be pathological.   Intermittent Explosive Disorder is type of emotional disorder where anger overloads and leads the person without reason.  Diagnosis is key to help someone learn to control their rage and emotion and find the emotional help.  The video below discusses what this disorder is and how individuals can better manager it and even more importantly how those involved with such individuals can protect themselves.

Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Anger Management.

5 Reasons Why Private Medical Practices Fail and What To Do About It

Medical professional putting on a latex gloveWritten by Veronica Turner.

Running a successful medical practice offers a unique set of challenges. It’s not just about being an excellent clinician, but also about mastering the art of management and client support.

From underestimating the work involved to failing to plan for the future, there are several pitfalls that often cause private practices to fail. But with strategies like refining client satisfaction rates and carving out a unique position in the market, these hurdles can be tackled efficiently.

Why Private Medical Practices Fail and What To Do About It

In the high-stakes world of private healthcare, understanding why some medical practices falter is crucial. Let’s examine five reasons and explore strategic solutions to rectify these issues.

Doctor’s Underestimate the Work Involved

Building a business from scratch is a lot of work, but many doctors underestimate this. After all, they went through medical school, so how hard could creating a business be? Unfortunately, many doctors find out the hard way that running a private practice is incredibly difficult.

The biggest issue here is that doctors assume patients will simply come to them, especially since there’s a doctor shortage in the US. Not only are patients not guaranteed, but there’s so many more doctors to worry about. If they aren’t prepared, their private practice could fail.

How Doctors Can Be More Prepared

Take stock of everything you need to do before opening up your practice. For example, you’ll need to know where your practice will be located, if you’ll take insurance, and who your ideal clients are. This will give you a better idea of how to market to your patients and customers.

Next, consider how many clinician workers you’ll have, how much you’ll pay them, and how you’ll be able to afford bills and taxes. Finally, think of the licenses and regulations you need to follow to run your practice, including HIPAA, privacy policies, and legal documents.

 

Low Client Satisfaction is a Rampant Problem

Doctors routinely drop the ball when it comes to client satisfaction. If you look up most private practices in your area, you’ll notice a lot of low ratings. These ratings can either come from the doctor (not listening to patients), the practice (dirty office), or the reception (rude staff members).

Costs also play a part as to why private practices don’t pay attention to customer satisfaction. However, if you don’t spend money on keeping your clients, you’re going to lose them. Not only that, but there’s a possibility they’ll leave a negative review that deters future patients.

How to Improve Client Satisfaction Rates

The first thing you need to do is to follow the best patient retention strategies. You’ll need to return phone calls and emails quickly, create an easy-to-navigate website, and clean your office. Make sure you focus on client confidentiality and building an online scheduling system.

And above all else, hire good doctors. Your doctors should be able to listen to their patients and take their concerns seriously. They should have the time to sit with the patient. If your patients feel rushed or glossed over, you’ll have a hard time keeping your private practice open.

 

The Medical Practice Isn’t Unique or Informative

Doctor shortages are a massive problem, but this doesn’t mean patients will automatically sign up for your private practice. And even if they do, they won’t stay long. To actually attract clients and pull them away from your competition, you’ll have to do something unique and noteworthy.

And what if your patients can’t even find you when they look you up online? If they can’t locate your number or address or whether or not you’re accepting new patients, you’ll just frustrate and confuse your patients. Not only that, but they’ll feel like their time is being wasted.

How to Separate Yourself From the Competition

First, take a look at what other private medical practices are offering in your area. You should at least offer the services they do. Alternatively, you could be known for something. For example, if no one offers a blood lab on site, then it’s a great idea to provide this service to your patients.

Keep in mind that uniqueness won’t matter much if you don’t market your services appropriately. On your website and social media, and on traditional media, think about how you’d want your patients to remember you. Make advertisements that show what you value and how you’ll help.

 

Lack of Planning for Future Growth

All business owners need to have a present and future mindset. The present mindset is essential for preserving your reputation and keeping client satisfaction high. The future mindset is vital for attracting new clients and ensuring that you keep growing (or don’t go backward).

Without a growth mindset, it’ll be difficult for doctors to stay in the game. This is why goal setting is so important. If you don’t know where you’re going, it’ll be hard to get there. On top of this, you need to set the right goals. Aim too high or low, and you won’t reach what you set out to do.

How to Create Goals With Your Analytics

You can start by actually tracking your analytics by using tools like Google Analytics. From there, you can establish your key performance indicators or KPIs. These could include total appointments in a month, total gross income in a month, and customer satisfaction scores.

Use SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound) goals to figure out what you want to achieve. A SMART goal could be, “I want to improve my customer satisfaction score by 25% in 2 months by calling clients back within 1 hour after leaving a message.”

 

Not Being Flexible or Adaptive

One of the most frustrating things a patient could ever experience is when a doctor isn’t up-to-date with research. Some doctors, for example, still tell concussion patients to avoid all stimuli within the first 48 days of the accident when this is proven to worsen symptoms.

A doctor’s lack of knowledge can affect their relationship with the patient and potentially hurt them. And even when a lack of flexibility isn’t this serious, it can still impact growth. For example, practices need to know about new marketing strategies to be successful.

How to Change With the Times

Make it mandatory for doctors to stay up-to-date with new medical information. Doctors should be tested to see if they can communicate with patients responsibly. If a doctor under your care provides poor medical advice, it’ll affect your patients, your bottom line, and your reputation.

Consider hiring a marketing team to find different ways to connect with your customers. Plenty of private practices are using tools like TikTok to connect with younger audiences. Also, consider writing a blog to improve your organic reach. This will help you populate on Google.

 

In Conclusion…

Navigating the complexities of running a private medical practice can be challenging, but with the right mindset and strategies, you’re more than equipped to turn obstacles into opportunities.

Remember not to underestimate the work involved, keep a keen eye on client satisfaction rates, and always stay unique and adaptive to changes. With meticulous planning for future growth guided by reliable analytics, success is just around the corner, no matter where you operate.

 

Author’s Bio: Veronica Turner is a health and lifestyle writer with over 10 years of experience. She creates compelling content on nutrition, fitness, mental health, and overall wellness.

 

 

 

Please also review AIHCP’s Case Management Certificate program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  These programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification.

What is “High Functioning” Depression?

A interesting term gaining momentum in mental health is “high functioning” depression.  It is not a new type of depression.  Major Depressive Disorder which last up to 2 weeks, or Season Affective Disorder which coincides with the season, or even Persistent Depressive Disorder which is chronic are all major types of depression seen in individuals.  Whether one is high functioning or unable to function does not differentiate the type, but it does point out towards a person’s attitude towards being depressed and possibly the intensity of the one experiencing depression.

High Functioning Depression is not a type of depression but an attitude that looks to ignore the symptoms despite the mental health risks

 

The article, “High-Functioning Depression: the Symptoms and Treatments” by Paul Wynn takes a closer look at this type of depression.  Again, he reiterates that there is no clinical term for high functioning depression but merely more of an attitude towards it.  He states,

“The American Psychiatric Association’s official diagnostic handbook does not recognize high-functioning depression as a clinical disorder. It’s also not a common term used among doctors to classify patients; High-functioning depression is one way people talk about having a depressive disorder to friends and family. “When speaking to my patients, I never describe them as a person with high-functioning depression; it’s just not a term we use around the office,” says Dr. Lorenzo Norris, associate professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences and chief wellness officer at the GW School of Medicine and Health Sciences in Washington, D.C.”

“High-Functioning Depression: the Symptoms and Treatments”. Wynn, P. (2022). US News.

To read the entire article, please click here

Commentary

Like any depression, one who experiences it, still faces the basic symptoms.  Those with high functioning depression are no different.  Individuals suffer from low self esteem, lack of energy, increased irritability, loss of interest, preferred isolation, and overall apathy.  The difference is how they manage it and react to it.  The ability to still perform tasks,  go to school or work, or still manage to be seen, stems more towards the severity of the depression itself, or the attitude towards it.  Numerous individuals who still keep functioning despite depression, usually are suffering from a more mild form of Major Depressive Disorder but many also have certain attitudes or feelings towards mental illness.

Some individuals may see mental health as something of a stigma or something to be ignored.  They may come from families where mental health issues are a sign of weakness and that individuals should work through their feelings and not permit them to affect their everyday work.  These types of individuals may see depression as an excuse or a weakness within character that others employ to escape reality.  They do not wish to be seen as weak or unable to cope

This is the case with many in business who feel they cannot be seen as weak or unable to perform tasks.  Instead of dealing with the emotions, they bury them and proceed forward.  Others may see they do not have the time to be mentally ill and need to focus on tasks and others under their care.  Hence an image and responsibility overtakes these types of individuals where they feel the need to hide the emotions, or dismiss them so that they can continue to operate at a high level.  These types of individuals may also ignore other health issues, but mental health is definitely something they do not have time to worry about.

Helping Those Who Do Not Want Help

Those around colleagues or family members will see the signs of depression. While the person remains seen, functioning and performing duties, the person still will manifest signs of depression.  Increased irritability and lack of patience in daily tasks will mount over time.  Disorganization, emotional outbursts and more fatigue may also start to manifest.  Maybe, the individual will also express less interest in hobbies, or activities outside of work or school.  They may not find interest in things that usually excite them.  For this reason, only those closest can truly tell if someone who is high functionally and depressed needs help.  Others from a distance will not know the individual well enough to pinpoint the exact issue.

Those close the person, can better see the wearing of depression upon an individual and look to help the person find help.

 

Once something is noticed, the closest within the circle and have an intervention and discuss the issues.  This may not be the most pleasant discussion but an emotional inventory needs to be completed.  The individual may finally admit to not feeling his or her best and finally admit certain feelings.  It is critical to identify these feelings so the person may receive the counseling or medication necessary to prevent further worsening of the condition and mental decline.  When individuals ignore mental symptoms of a larger problem, they do not usually disappear but only worsen.  This will not only negatively effect the person’s health but also eventually wear down on the ability of the person to function.

Conclusion

High Functioning Depression is not a different type of depression but a type of depression combined with a particular person’s attitudes about mental health. It may have to do some with severity of the depression but it usually has to do with a person’s attitude about mental health or the person’s roles that he or she feels cannot be put to the side.  It is hence important for individuals close to the person to help the person realize the importance of finding treatment and educating them on the issues that surround untreated depression itself.

Many individuals see depression as a sign of weakness. Please also review AIHCP’S Grief Counseling Program

 

Grief Counselors, as well as licensed counselors can help individuals find the help they need.  Grief Counselors can direct clients to licensed therapists who can better help those with any type of depression find the balance and counseling they need to better cope with it.  Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it matches your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.

Additional Resources

“What is high-functioning depression?”. Coelho, S. (2020). Medical News Today.  Access here

“What Is ‘High-Functioning’ Depression?”, Gupta, S. (2022). VeryWellMind. Access here

“What does ‘high-functioning depression’ mean? We asked experts”. Chiu, A. (2022).  The Washington Post. Access here

“Please Stop Thinking My High-Functioning Depression Makes Me Lazy”. Shannon-Karasik, C. (2019). HealthLine.  Access here

 

Christian Mystics Understood

In a previous blog, we discussed the extraordinary reality of spiritual gifts in the Church, including discernment of them, as well as the fact healings and miracles still happen in the modern Church.  While many seek out the extraordinary, the reality is God is always with us.  In daily prayer, scripture meditation, the Eucharist, at service or mass, or when helping the poor and afflicted.  Still, the human soul seeks out these extraordinary events or individuals, to maybe strengthen faith, look for verification, find a particular healing, or find deeper wisdom.  Obviously again discernment is key.  Above all, listening to the Church or Elders or those in ministry who warn against certain events or individuals.

Apparitions and mystics are considered private revelation.  This means that any revelations, teachings, or prophesies that emerge are not part of the deposit of faith, or equal to that of Scripture or the teachings found in the Creed.  While they may very well be from God and true, the weight of the message is not binding on all believers but merely, when approved by spiritual authorities, additional spiritual ideas.

Christian Mystics are private revelation but still have important messages. Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Counseling Certification

 

It is important to differentiate Christian mystics and holy apparitions from fortune tellers and the occult.  Unlike the occult where powers are tied to Satan or unseen voices, Christian mystics receive their spiritual gifts from God.  They are put forward as a service to the Church.  They do not attempt to seek out but are freely given.  They do not attempt to meet the dead or find voices but are freely met in Christian love between the Church Triumphant in Heaven to the Church Militant on earth.

In these experiences, the message is for the seer or is meant for a broader base of the Christian community.  Hence some are for the spiritual advancement of the individual soul, while others are told to write and share their experiences for others.  Some act in the title of prophet with warnings, while others may offer deeper spiritual insights into the realm of God.

St Teresa of Avila is very well known Catholic mystic and Doctor of the Church for her numerous insights into communion with God.  Many of her private spiritual experiences were shared in the “Interior Castle”.  She speaks of some extraordinary experiences with God that some souls are blessed with on earth.  In all her writings, she reports that such experiences are gifts and never a sign of worthiness by the soul.  The soul that finds itself so in love with God though is sometimes bestowed with additional blessings.  St Teresa refers to this as spiritual ecstasy where the soul forgets itself and finds the most perfect union with God that is available while alive.  In this state, the soul is fed the presence of God and seeks only perfect unification with Him.  St Teresa refers to this in analogy as spiritual marriage.  In these states, the mystic has been known to levitate or change appearance in the presence with God.   The “Interior Castle” is a classic for all Christians, not just Catholics, seeking a closer union with God.  St. Teresa outlines the relationship the soul seeks with God on this earth and its many challenges and stepping stones.

St Teresa of Avila is known for her famous work. “The Interior Castle”

 

Some mystics have also given more insight into the life of Christ, or have referred messages from Christ.   St Margaret Mary detailed experiences in which she witnessed the appearance of Christ under the title “The Sacred Heart”.  The message from Christ was His intense love for humanity but the pain of sin upon His Sacred Heart.  St. Faustina also received communication from Christ as the Sacred Heart and was given the “Chaplet of Mercy” prayer where souls pray for forgiveness to Christ for reparation against sins committed against His Sacred Heart.  In the prayer, the Christian repeats, “For the sake of His Sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world”.

Another classic work about the hidden life of Christ came from Sister Mary Agreda in her famous work, “The Mystical City of God”.   In this, Agreda relates a series of visions between Christ and His mother regarding the life of Christ.  There are numerous details that supplement the stories of Scripture giving more insight into the feeling of Christ.  Nothing in the apparitions contradict Scripture or deny the events themselves.  Another famous apparition, utilized in Mel Gibson’s, “The Passion of the Christ” also comes from a mystic known as Blessed Sister Anne Catherine Emmerich who received intense visions of Christ’s passion.  The visions intensity discussed in far greater detail the brutality Christ endured at the cross and the role Satan played in the events of Christ’s torture and death.

Some mystics are also visionaries.  Blessed Lucia, St. Francisco and St. Jacinta, who experienced apparitions of Mary in 1917 experienced her presence 6 separate times from May to October of that year.  The events were culminated with the famous miracle of the sun, where thousands witnessed the dancing of the sun in the sky.  Eye witnesses accounted different visions, some seeing the sun dance, others seeing the face of Christ in the sun, and others seeing the sun fly towards the earth.  Ultimately a very wet and dreary day became totally dry as if drought had existed prior, according to eye witnesses.  The message was to pray for reparation for the sins committed against Christ through the rosary.  If not, Mary warned the rise of Russia and great wars to follow.  There are other numerous apparitions throughout the 2000 history of the Church, including Guadalupe in Mexico as well as Lourdes in France.

Other mystics manifest extraordinary signs and wonders.  St Padre Pio manifested the stigmata, where the wounds of Christ appeared on his hands.  St. Francis of Assisi also exhibited this type of spiritual martyrdom.   What makes Padre Pio’s wounds so more interesting is because he lived in the mid 20th Century and unlike St Francis of the 13th Century, Padre Pio’s wounds were documented, photographed and empirically analyzed.  While this type of manifestation is rare, it has occurred throughout the history of the Church.  In addition, according to sources, Padre Pio was able to be in other places, read thoughts of others, and constantly engaged in spiritual battle with the evil one that sometimes included physical beatings.

St Padre Pio and the stigmata

 

In SC600, the text book on Christian Mystics includes many of these saints but is far more comprehensive also including Christian mystics from other traditions.  Ultimately, it is important to remember that Christian mystics are supplemental and not necessary to one’s core relationship with Jesus Christ.  They are considered private and not official teaching of the faith.  It is extremely important to cautiously approach any mystic without official Church approval.  St Ignatius Loyola taught extensively on discernment and discernment is key in any message that does not come from Scripture itself.  While many of these visions and messages may be true, other charlatans play on the weakness of others, or worst yet, are manipulated by the evil one.

As Christians, we are not called to go looking for supernatural  and extraordinary messages. Scripture is very clear to avoid spiritualists and fortune tellers.  Instead, we are to live our life in prayer and love of Christ, accepting His will and crosses.  But when pain occurs, so many times, individuals look for something tangible they can touch.  Instead of merely opening the Bible or praying in Church, they seek out the extraordinary to find proof, or a message.  This can lead to an obsession that the devil can easily use against oneself.  While it is fine for pilgrims to visit sacred sites, read about apparitions, explore approved miracles, it is important that they also realize that God is ever present in their lives if they just look inward.  I personally feel, approved mystics and their messages are beautiful and strengthening to the faith, but they should never be our main spiritual meal.  Our main spiritual meal should consist of prayer, scripture, and the Eucharist.  Those things are the most important to our daily lives.  The other approved mysteries through private revelation that God has revealed enhance our faith and strengthen existing ties, or bring non believers to the faith.  If ones faith is “only” about seeking out supernatural events and not consisting primarily of daily prayer, then one needs to refocus on Christ and His message.

Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Counseling Certification and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification

Additional Resources

“13 Powerful Women Mystics Who Helped Shape Christianity”. Blumberg, A. (2015). Huffington Post.  Access here

“Christian Mysticism Through History”. Learn Religions.  Access here

“12 Interesting facts about St. Teresa of Avila”. Bosch, M. (2015). Aleteia. Access here

“What happened at the Miracle of Fátima?”. Silva, L. (2021). Portugual.com.  Access here

 

How to decide if a care home is right for your loved one

Smiling multiracial female physiotherapist assisting senior man in walking with walker at home. Unaltered, physical therapy, healthcare, patient, retirement, recovery, support, disability concept.

Written by Laura-Jane Evans

Taking the decision to move your loved one into a care home can be really tricky. They might object to the idea, or you might feel that you’re failing in your responsibilities to them. The truth is that the right care home can improve the quality of life for your loved one, and make it easier for you, allowing you to enjoy the time you spend with them rather than filling it with caring tasks. With over 1.3 million residents in care homes in the US, it’s clear that this is a decision many people will have to make at some point.

But choosing the right care home is a crucial part of the process. Every place will offer something slightly different, so it’s important to take your time and consider the options carefully so that everyone is happy. Let’s explore some of the factors you should consider.

Take time to understand what care they need

Sometimes, taking the decision to look at care homes is just the result of deteriorating health, but in many cases, it’s triggered by a feeling of overwhelm following a fall or something similar. This can make it hard to think carefully about what care your loved one needs, and if the home you’re looking at can offer that. If you feel that you need to move your family member urgently, you’ll feel under pressure to choose a place quickly.

However, taking the time to understand the care that they need is really important. Do you need to look for a specialist care home for a certain medical condition? Will they need ad-hoc support or around-the-clock care? Are they likely to need care at night? Will they have the chance to be independent if they want to, or does every resident get treated the same?

You can write down your own answers to these questions, but also make sure to ask your loved one if possible, or any carers you already have visiting on a daily basis. You can then use this list as a criteria for narrowing down your choices.

Consider the future

As well as understanding the care your loved one needs now, you’ll also need to consider what things might look like in the future. Unfortunately, things can deteriorate rapidly, and it might be wise to choose a care home that offers different levels of care as and when needed.

For example, if your relative only needs once-per-day check-ins now, but might need them more regularly in the future, make sure that is an option. It’s highly disruptive to move someone once they’re settled at a care home – and on the other end of the scale, you don’t want to force them to have full-time care and lose their independence if they don’t need it. Independent living is particularly vital for seniors, as it gives them a sense of control and purpose, as well as supporting their memory skills.

Look at the location of any potential care homes

The location of a care home is important for two reasons: proximity to family and friends, and proximity to local services if your loved one is able to use them. Firstly, you’ll want to make sure that your relative can have plenty of visitors if they’d like them, which means choosing a place that’s either close to as many people as possible, or has good transport links to enable them to get there easily. Part of the resistance to moving into a care home sometimes stems from the fear of being isolated and lonely, so do your best to combat this from the start, so it isn’t a barrier.

Secondly, not everyone who moves into a care home needs to remain in their room or in the home 24/7. Depending on their health, they may be able to go on planned excursions to the local town or the surrounding area. Care homes that are close to towns or other attractions are more likely to offer these sorts of trips, so consider this when making your choice. This may make moving into a care home more attractive to your loved one, especially if they can’t currently manage these sorts of trips themselves.

Meet the staff team

If you’re looking at care homes, it’s understandable that you’d want to ensure that the people who are looking after your loved one are kind, well-trained and compassionate. After all, they would be taking your place when you’re not there. So, when trying to decide if a care home is right for your family member, make sure you take the time to speak with the manager of the homes you’re considering, and visit in person if possible.

Care workers need to be dependable, good communicators and trustworthy, so look out for these traits in the staff when you make your visit. If they seem unorganized, unable to answer your questions, or like they’re rushing through their tasks, the home might not be the right fit.

Speak to your loved one

If your loved one is well enough to give input into this decision, then make sure to include them. This is a big change that will impact every part of their life, so whilst you might be taking the lead in making enquiries, they need to feel like they have a chance to contribute to the discussion. No one likes to feel blindsided, so before you make any commitments, make sure that you have their input about what they would like from their new home. By doing so, you are showing them that you see them as an individual, and give them the respect they deserve.

 

Author bio: Laura-Jane Evans

Having trained as a care worker initially, Laura-Jane now works in the community to provide social events and talks for seniors from surrounding nursing homes. She believes that everyone has the right to good care.

 

 

Please also review AIHCP’s Case Management Certificate program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals.  These programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification.

Religious Decline and Why?

Declines in religious affiliation have been occurring for the last 75 years.  Stronger close knit religious generations have weakened overall every preceding generation.  Even by the standards of 1972, when over 90 percent of the nation considered itself Christian, it now only lingers around 60 percent according to a Pew Survey.  The amazing decline is how in the modern day 30 percent of the population has drifted to atheistic, agnostic or unsure.  This dramatic shift did not happen overnight but occurred over time and due to various abuses and secularistic ideals.

Dwindling Church attendance are all signs of a decline in faith and religion.

 

The article, “Losing their religion: why US churches are on the decline” by Adam Gabbatt looked at these statistics from the Pew Survey as well as others and found a steady decline in Christian Protestant Churches, as well as decline in attendance in both Catholic and Protestant Churches.  He states,

“Churches are closing at rapid numbers in the US, researchers say, as congregations dwindle across the country and a younger generation of Americans abandon Christianity altogether – even as faith continues to dominate American politics. As the US adjusts to an increasingly non-religious population, thousands of churches are closing each year in the country – a figure that experts believe may have accelerated since the Covid-19 pandemic.”

“Losing their religion: why US churches are on the decline”. Gabbatt, A. (2023). The Guardian.

To read the entire article, please click here

Commentary 

One can easily attribute the fall of Christianity in America to Satan.  Of course, he is the mastermind and puppet master of every trick, but there are concrete reasons for the fall of religious participation in the United States that have indirectly led to this religious vacuum.  Satan has his hand on it, but society has to also take responsibility.

Religious Sloth 

Religious sloth is one of the primary problems that some do not even recognize.  While grandparents attended Mass, church service or performed daily prayers in open sight of children, their children became more lax in emphasizing the religious teachings and obligations.  This sloth has spread in many American families which has led to individuals with little knowledge of the faith, or desire to attend.  Instead, many Christians do not have family experiences of consistent Sunday obligation or daily prayer.  The young generation is not educated, nor told the importance of their faith.  Instead they fall victim to other “isms” and social norms that take the place of the faith.

In addition, many families lack the same structure as in the past. Single family homes account for a growing number of Christian families.  Through divorce, many single parent families lacked the structure or desire to ensure a child made it to service or mass.  This accounted for more religious sloth in religious education and religious participation.

Dusty bibles and lack of prayer life are signs of religious sloth.

 

The Covid Pandemic damaged a weak existing Church-going base.  With the closing of Churches for the pandemic, individuals without strong faith roots, acquired new habits of not attending.  First, by simply watching a service on television, then gradually dismissing it all together.  This also led to a poor spiritual life void of Scripture, prayer or God.  The void created a vacuum for modern day social views and “isms”.

The Church first starts at home.  With broken families, religious sloth, has weakened a generation from understanding the faith, defending it, and participating in the mysteries of it.

Various “Isms”

The last 75 years have created a religious vacuum, where Christianity and many organized religions have been replaced by other “isms” to replace humanity’s natural needs.  Secularism and Materialism as always constant distractions to religion, gladly moved into the hearts and minds of the next generation.  The new god was the world and the world offered more because the true God was no longer emphasized.  With technology and new advances, individuals found secular life more exciting.  With secular life came new social norms and values.  Secular Humanism presented a new morality regarding life and death, sex and choice,  and gender and personhood.  These new radical ideas were not challenged but openly accepted.  The ideas of Christianity were then considered biased, judgmental, hateful and wrong.

Religious Abuse and Extremism

The abuses within the Church added to the problem in this sharp decline.  The Catholic Church’s sexual abuses weakened the image of the Church and its credibility.  In Protestant Churches, sex scandals and financial scandals also rocked the faith of the youth.  These abuses led many away from religion and into the hands of secularism.

Many have been turned away from the faith to extremist groups that enshrine themselves with political parties.  An idea of a Christian Nationalist in America frightens many youth.  Many of the political and social ideals do not match the next generation.  While the Church should not change dogma for social approval, many non religious do not wish to align with religious ideas that do not align with contemporary social ideals.  Many of those within religious organizations present an extremist view, as well as a hypocritical but still judgmental attitude.  The alignment with religion with the “right” and any political party has helped isolate religion from many youth.  Especially when, high ranking religious officials or politicians who claim religion show ill example in in public scandals.  This still does not mean the Christian Churches must bow doctrine to social norms but it needs to exchange dialogue on issues of homosexuality, gay marriage, and abortion in a way that does not fall trap to hypocrisy, hate, or extremist views.

Spiritual but Not Religious

Many of the 30 percent who did not align themselves with any particular creed, or voiced uncertainty, have turned to spirituality.  Within spirituality, individuals carve out their own religious beliefs and how they wish to speak with God.  When spirituality is void of religion, the personal trek without an objective moral code, can lead one into many errors.  One in essence can become a cafeteria Christian that creates and choose what rules one wishes to keep. Spirituality is key but when it is isolated from religion it becomes a faith of one.   Likewise those who are religious but lack a spiritual life, are merely shells of the faith and usually utilize faith as a weapon or form of identity only.

A healthy faith is both religious and spiritual. Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Counseling Certification

 

Humanity is spiritual and most people thirst for spirituality and divine connection.  With the religious extremism and abuse, coupled with the pandemic, and lack of family values within the church at its core level, the family, other spiritual options have appeared.  These options many times allow individuals to match their faith with the social norms of the day and as well experiment with multiple religious ideals.  New Age, Eastern religions, and other spiritual quests have driven people away from the Church due to its lack of presence and ability to combat the new “isms” and social norms of the day.

Church Reform

The Church needs to reform itself both in its Catholic and Protestant forms.  Religious extremism and abuse need to be eradicated.  The Church needs to offer real solutions but not from high pulpit but through example one person at a time.  It needs to preach the message of Jesus without compromise to social norms, but with a authenticity, zeal, and intelligence.  It needs to answer the scary questions but show that the Jesus’ way is one of love.  It needs again to attract the youth to this mission.  Exposing the lies of secularism and modern social norms can only be accomplished through a totally reformed Church that can clearly present the message of Christ.  What Jesus has to offer is superior to any message today but somehow, somewhere, along the way, families stopped teaching it and those at the pulpit corrupted it.  Reform and revitalization are key.  The message of Christ can still excite the masses when it is properly utilized and presented.  Christianity is not a nationalistic religion of the right, nor is it a judgmental and hateful creed, but one that adheres to the laws of Christ with love and compassion.  I truly believe that if everyone truly properly understood the faith, participated in it, and experienced it, then the misconceptions, abuses, and hypocrisy that surrounds it would be dismissed.

Without Faith

While not proposing one law of morality over others in a pluralistic society, we still must acknowledge that religion and religion tied to family life increases civic and good moral behavior.  While the atheist may blame religion for wars, the reality is wars would still exist, just another difference or secular doctrine would be used as an excuse.  Religion has been misused many times for war, or by extremists to promote hate or division, but that does not mean religion is bad.  Religious life is important, or at least a world code that ties one to some responsible duty to one’s neighbor.  While faith is given to God, the by products it gives to one’s neighbor creates in a social contract.

Without faith, morality drops.  The drop in the modern world of morality cannot be a coincidence with the drop of faith in the home.

Conclusion

If ever there was a need to restore the Christian Church in America, it is now.  This does not only include reaching out to people and better presenting an option of why Christ and His laws are the way, but also by living by example.  Christians need to set better examples and also present in a logically and non hateful way, why  what the world offers is contrary to true happiness.  Sometimes in dark hours, people return to God.  With wars, famines and political divide, people may finally in the future start turning back to God.  Till now, the numbers continue to dwindle.

Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Counseling Certification

 

Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Counseling Certification.  Christian Counselors and Pastoral Counselors can play a key role in education and guiding individuals in the faith.  They can play a role in aiding the restoration of the faith in the modern world.  AIHCP offers an online and independent study certification for qualified individuals seeking a four year certification in Christian Counseling.

Additional Resources

“Modeling the Future of Religion in America”. (2022). Pew Research Center. Access here

“Generation Z and the Future of Faith in America”. Cox, D. (2022). Survey Center on American Life.  Access here

“The Great Decline: 60 years of religion in one graph”. RNS. Access here

“People everywhere believe society’s morals are in decline”. Wilcox, J. (2023). Science.  Access here

 

 

 

 

Grief Counseling Human Development Video

As human beings, we reach certain points in social development that are key to a successful life.  From a mere toddler to teenage years and from midlife to elderly days, we need to meet certain goals and points.  Erick Erickson listed numerous points of achievement that need to be completed within the human life span.  When these goals are not met, individuals regress or unable to find satisfaction in life.

This obviously has allot to do with individuals and their overall happiness or unhappiness in life.  Many grieve a life that has not met one’s aspirations.  This is due many times because individuals did not develop socially.  They look back with sadness or inability to move forward.  They have regrets and remain stagnant in life.  Grief Counselors through an understanding of a person’s life narrative, can better address abstract grief in an individual and help diagnose where the grief is coming from by understanding a person’s life story.

Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in grief counseling.

C.S Lewis and Grief

C.S Lewis is a classical English writer of the 20th Century.  His observations on grief are insightful as well intense as he documents the grief felt of losing the wife, H.  Throughout, his work, “A Grief Observed” (originally published in 1961),  the loss torments the writer as he proceeds through the various struggles of an English Christian husband who lost a wife.   His struggle includes the intensity of the pain of the grief and its many adjectives and similes, as well as the outward feelings towards others, his past, his beliefs, his anger, his desolation, and finally his renewal.  In it one sees the numerous phases and oscillations of the messy roadmap of mourning. It is not only an emotional journey, but also a philosophical one that questions pain and suffering and how it can co-exist with a good God.  It captures the the progress and regression of how one laments one day but rejoices the next, curses another but venerates later.  It is in essence a progression of grief that illustrates the despair, the anger, and ultimately the adjustment to the loss.  It does not offer a true happy ending but an appeasement and contentment that naturally overtime proceeds from loss.  One never truly heals from loss but learns to live without but with a sprinkle of hope.

Grief

C.S Lewis masterfully captures some of the raw emotion associated with intense and acute grief following loss.  He states, “Noone ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid.  The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning and swallowing” (Lewis, C.S, p. 1).   He continues that it sometimes feels like “invisible blanket between the world and me” (Lewis, C.S. p. 1).

C.S Lewis masterfully captures the raw pain and existential crisis caused by the loss of a loved one. Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Grief Certification

 

Lewis mentions the continual acute phases of grief that overtake him.  He feels fatigue that prevents him from doing the littlest things, such as even shaving (Lewis, C.S. p.3).    In the grief, he feels the shame of being seen by others in public.  He comments how some wish to walk away, or others try to say the right thing or how an younger married couple may think that he is a symbol of their future (Lewis, C.S. p. 10-11).   He also fears publics places he once ventured.  He is afraid to return too soon to places where he and H. once shared good times.  He compares it to as “sending a pilot up again as soon as possible after he’s had a crash” (Lewis, C.S. p. 11).   He in particular takes offense to the good willed sayings of others within the congregation who remark that H. is now in God’s hands.  This only frustrates him more, as he asks, if she is in God’s hands, how can it be any better, if she was in God’s hands on Earth and suffered? (Lewis, C.S. p. 27).   This is an excellent example of how in grief counseling, individuals should not try to fix the bereaved but sojourn with them and acknowledge the pain instead of trying to lift it.

A great fear of most grievers is losing the memory of a beloved.  Lewis is haunted by the fear of losing her memory.   He states, “I have no photograph of her that’s any good. I cannot even see her face distinctly in my imagination” (Lewis, C.S. p. 15).   Others tell him, she will live in your memory, but he laments that idea of living.   He exclaims in fear and anguish, “What’s left?  A corpse, a memory and (in some versions) a ghost? All mockeries or horrors.  Three more ways of spelling the word dead” (Lewis, C.S. p. 20). He further revels in the fear of those who have finally come to peace with loss.  He remarks how he cannot envision how a man with a hoe and watering pot visiting the churchyard, happily exclaimed it was time to visit “mum”.   Lewis remarks, “A six-by-three foot flower-bed has become mum” (Lewis, C.S. p.21).  Yet, Lewis is not yet at the point to understand the continuation of bonds.  The pain is still too raw, too soon, and too painful.

Wishing to see her again also, sways him back from grief to guilt.  He wishes to see her but then sees this wish to bring her back is a selfish love.  He corrects himself and realizes that this self pity is horribly selfish and to wish her back is a cruel endeavor, especially with the suffering she endured to escape this world.  He speculates, “They call Stephen the first martyr. Hadn’t Lazarus the rawer deal? (Lewis, C.S., p. 41).

He reviews within his mind a mixed guilt of possibly getting over something too soon.  Someone truly does not recover from such an operation.  He compares this grief to someone losing a leg.  One learns to adjust, but it forever affects oneself.  When one awakes, or dresses, the reality is always there, even if one finds joy in day to day situations.

He also asks himself though, if there is shame in finding happiness, or if one is obligated to prolong one’s own unhappiness (Lewis, C.S. p.52-53).  This is classical in grieving.  One feels an obligation to grieve a certain time.  Grief has no time table and each individual needs to process the grief and then without guilt, heal. It is obvious that Lewis understands this concept but poetically displays the inner pain of those who suffer loss.

Anger

Within the initial shockwaves of pain, Lewis articulates his frustration and anger with God.  He points out that God is always around when one is happy, but when you need Him, he refers to it as ” a door slammed in your face” (Lewis, C.S. p.6).  He does not fully come to any conclusion to deny the existence of God, although he does question the goodness of God.  He points out that Christ too was forsaken, but does that make it easier to understand? (Lewis, C.S. p.6).  He begins to view God as being who really does not care.  In later chapters, he reflects on this anger. He states, “All that stuff about the Cosmic Sadist was not so much the expression of thought as of hatred.  I was getting from it the only pleasure a man can get; the pleasure of hitting back”.  He continues that what he thought he knew was not true, but felt that at least it might offed him or other worshippers (Lewis, C.S. p. 40)

Many become angry with God in the initial phases of grief but according to Lewis the door is never slammed shut and bolted. He is always with us

 

Philosophically, Lewis does not dismiss the existence of God, but in acute grief, comments how one may believe God is far from good.  He points out that “Is it rational to believe in a bad God?  Anyway, in a God so bad as all that?  The Cosmic Sadist, the spiteful imbecile? (Lewis, C.S, p.30).  He wonders if this is good, then how is God good?  He later reprimands himself for feeling this, but continues to question the reason for this cruel suffering.   He laughs at himself how once he could tell those who suffered loss that their beloved one is in a better place.   He remarks that he knew bad things could happen and even warned and prepared himself not to place happiness in the world, but he points out that once it happens to you, it is far different.   Once being a source of faith, he know sees his faith as a house that has collapsed.  He states, “If my house has collapsed at one blow, that is because it a house of cards” (Lewis, C.J. p. 37).  He mocks how he once so easily gave advice, but now cannot it for himself.  Was it because he truly did not care about others, or that he never truly understood the severity of it?

Healing

Stemming from the long suffering and pain, Lewis slowly begins to heal.  He begins to realize his love remains and he can even sometimes hear his wife in a different way.  He remarks his great fear of losing her memory, but now has a sense of her.  He comments, “She seems to meet me everywhere.  Meet is far too strong a word.  I don’t mean anything remotely like an apparition or voice.  I don’t mean even any strikingly emotional experience at any particular moment.  Rather, a sort of unobtrusive but massive sense that she is, just as much as ever, a fact to be taken into account” (Lewis, C.S, p. 51). He also remembers how easily he could misjudge a man in a similar situation who now has happiness despite the loss. He remarks, ” I might have said, ‘He’s got over it.  He’s forgotten his wife’. but the truth was, ‘He remembers her better because he has partly got over it'”(Lewis, C.S., p.45).

 

Lewis learns that healing is not forgetting but remembering in a healthy way.  Please also review AIHCP’s Grief and Christian Grief Counseling Certifications

 

He further remarks that even with God, he no longer feels the door is slammed shut.  He states that sometimes God is there but one is too frantic to hear or be saved, as if a drowning man kicking and screaming (Lewis, C.S. p 46).   He asks if God is the vet or the vivisector (Lewis, C.S. p. 40).  Is God truly healing and helping the person through the pain into a better life. Lewis ultimately understands that God does not wish suffering but walks with the sufferers and relieves them of the pain and transforms them into life.  While those on Earth, may not understand the ultimate mystery, and may refuse to hear, God is not the sadist, he thought in anger, but a rescuer.   He sees God as the giver and H. as the gift.  H. becomes the garden and God the gardener, or H. the sword and God the smith.  God perfects His gifts in the next life and this gives Lewis comfort (Lewis, C.S. p. 62-63).

He confirms to himself that the road to H. is through God, but he also corrects himself and reminds himself that God should never be a means to an end.  He realizes that through loving God, he loves H. and they will find union in that love together (Lewis, C.S., p. 68-69).   He furthermore realizes that God no longer did not answer his knocking of the door or reject his needs.  Lewis states, “it is not the locked door.  It is more like a silent, certainly not uncompassionate, gaze. As through He shook His head not in refusal but waiving the question.  Like, ‘Peace, child; you don’t understand'”(Lewis, C.S. p. 69).

Conclusion

From a Christian perspective, Lewis explains the emotional pain of losing someone and still being a believer.  He triumphantly captures the nature of grief but also adds elements of Christian grieving.  He proceeds through the phases and oscillations of grief and faces many existential questions.  While reading the words, one truly can start to prepare or recall the true abandonment one can face in the pain of grief and how hard it is again to find solace and peace.

Please also review AIHCP’s Christian Grief Counseling Program.  Those who are already Grief certified are eligible for the specialty program.  Like the Grief Counseling Certification, the Christian Grief Counseling Certification is online and independent study.

Reference

“A Grief Observed”. Lewis, C.S. (1961).  Harper Collins Publishers. (1994)

Additional Resources

“C.S. Lewis”. (2021). Biography.  Access here

“C. S. Lewis”. Wikipedia.  Access here

“A GRIEF OBSERVED”. Harmon, J. (2013). C.S Lewis Institute.  Access here

“The boredom and the fear of grief”. Grady, C. (2021). Vox. Access here