Grief Counseling Education: 5 Tips to Dealing with a Miscarriage

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Grief Counseling Education and 5 Tips to Dealing with a Miscarriage

 

Dealing with a miscarriage can be heartbreaking for both you and your partner. By practicing good self-care in the days and weeks following this tragic event, you can ensure that you will maintain your mental and physical health and prepare yourself for the next steps in your family planning. Read on for five tips to follow if you’ve had a recent miscarriage.

1. Follow Up with Your OB/GYN
According to Vitals, seeing your medical provider after your miscarriage can help determine the cause of the miscarriage. While this is a very common occurrence in early pregnancy, recurrent miscarriage can be a sign of an underlying condition that your doctor may be able to treat. According to Dr. Gilbert W. Webb, medical care is also important to ensure that you are physically healthy after a miscarriage, particularly if you’re planning to try to get pregnant again.

2. Pay Attention to Physical Recovery
It may take several weeks before your body feels normal again following a miscarriage. Many women experience vaginal bleeding, cramping, and breast discomfort. Ask your doctor how you can best treat these symptoms. If possible, consider taking time off work or limiting normal activities until you feel better; however, if you are up to your usual routine, that’s fine too.

3. Grieve Your Loss
You’ve experienced a profound loss, and giving yourself a chance to feel the emotions associated with this loss is an important part of the grief process. It’s normal to feel sad, angry, disappointed, and confused following a miscarriage. Share these emotions with a partner and/or trusted friend. If you feel you’re struggling with resuming normal life, you may want to seek professional counseling.

4. Seek Counseling if Need Be
If you’re having trouble dealing with your emotions after having a miscarriage, ask your provider for resources. He or she may be able to recommend a counselor that can help you sort out your feelings. In addition, a pregnancy loss support group in your area can be an invaluable resource.

5. Prepare for Future Pregnancies
When you feel emotionally ready, it’s usually safe to get pregnant again as soon as your menstrual cycle returns to normal. Every woman is different, though, so talk with your doctor about your individual situation.

While miscarriage can be devastating, keep in mind that the majority of women who experience a loss go on to have healthy pregnancies and babies. If you have several miscarriages, talk with your doctor about ways to solve the underlying issues and improve your fertility.

By Lizzie Weakley

(My name is Lizzie Weakley and I am a freelance writer from Columbus, Ohio. I went to college at The Ohio State University where I studied communications. I enjoy the outdoors and long walks in the park with my 3-year-old husky Snowball.)

 

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Grief Counseling Certification Program:Grief

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Grief Counseling Certification Program: The Many Faces of Grief: Common Emotions that are Experienced

 

Grief is a universal emotion and experience. Everyone will go through grief in their life time. Many will repeat the experience throughout their lives. For a long time grief was shunned by society. People really did not understand it and so it was often a very private experience. Often times the person in grief believed that what they were going through emotionally was abnormal and so they were often reluctant to discuss their experiences. Little had been written about grief and thus people also did not know what to say or do to assist a family member or friend who was in the midst of the grieving process.

 

Today things have certainly changed. Grief has been studied extensively over the past several decades and we now know much more about it. Clinical research has been better able to more clearly define this phenomenon and we continue to learn more about it all the time. We have come to understand what intense emotions are confronted in grief and we also have come to develop solid interventions and strategies to help people with their grief experiences.

 

While grief is a subjective experience and unique in many ways, we have learned over the years that there are several stages of grief which are actually universal in nature.

 

These universal grief experiences include the following:

 

Shock and Denial
This phase often manifests itself in a sort of numbness, a feeling of disbelief and a sense of helplessness. This may occur immediately at the awareness of the loss of loved one or the loss of any kind. People may experience feelings of things being unreal, or feel like they are in some dream state. Denial is a strong experience and often people will respond to a loss as if it did not occur. Observers of this may think the person does not care or does not understand what has happened. The observation of denial can be perceived in many ways. In some cases the denial can be very intense and dramatic. When this occurs, professional help may be needed.
2. Pain and Guilt
As the shock and/or denial abate, it is often replaced with feelings of longing for the one we have lost.  It is standard at this stage to experience guilt and remorse about things we may have done or not done, said or not said, to that person. Overwhelming emotional pain is difficult to deal with, and should not be stifled. In this phase we most often see people express themselves much more and we also will likely witness crying and the expression of many types of regrets.
3. Anger
A common question those in grief ask is ‘Why?’ Why Him/Her? Why us? Why me? Finding the answer to this question causes frustration and anger. It is common at this stage to try to find something or someone to blame, or take your frustration out on. In this phase we may often see the person experiencing trembling, and there may even be physiologic manifestations such as increases in blood pressure and pulse rates. Anger may even be expressed toward God for the loss. It is beneficial to encourage those in grief to verbalize their anger but to do so in more constructive ways.

4. Melancholy
You may experience a period of introversion. This stage of the process may leave you feeling low, and you may find you spend a lot of time reflecting on the experiences you had with your loved one. Those close to you will often try to encourage you not to wallow in your grief. However, this is an important part of the process. It allows you to work through your feelings about the one you have lost, as well as reflect on your time together. It is common to feel depressed and this should be acknowledged. If the depression persists for long periods of time or one begins to contemplate self-harm or suicide, professional intervention should be undertaken

5. Hope for the Future.
The sense of hopelessness and despair you felt will start to lessen. You can now begin adjusting to life without the person you have lost. Often, people in this stage of the process start to think about how they might best commemorate and celebrate the life of the person they have lost.  Deciding on an online memorial can be a great way to honour your loved ones. It allows you to have a permanent reminder of them which everyone can have access to, be involved in creating and even add to.

6. Readjustment and Acceptance.
You will eventually begin to feel that you can settle in to new routines, and maybe even start making plans for your future. Life will seem less overwhelming. You can think about and talk about the deceased with more sense of a peace, rather than experiencing anguish. You have moved away from the intense pain of grief at this phase.

 

Time for Grieving

 

How long does this general process of grieving last? There is no good response to this question.  Grief takes “as long as it takes.” While the above stages are generally universal, the time in grief is not universal. It is uniquely individualized. Some go through the experience and reach acceptance much sooner for others; it can sometimes take several years or more.

 

When the experience of grief persist for more than several years or when the symptoms continue to cripple the grieving person in living their lives then professional help is needed.  A professional who has a certification in grief counseling can be of tremendous help. This professional is schooled in therapeutic interventions for grieving and can really assist in helping the person better cope and progress in the grief experience.

 

As time goes on we will learn more about grief and how people experience it. This will lead us to the development of even more and often better interventions. The time is now for society to become better educated about grief and to learn some common and simple ways to help others through this experience.

 

If you would like to learn more about our Grief Counseling Certification Program, then please review

The American Academy of Grief Counseling

 

4 Neonatal Diseases and How You Can Prevent and Treat Them

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Healthcare Professionals and Neonatal Diseases

According to the World Health Organization, each year three million babies die within their first month. Many of these infants suffer from common complications that can be prevented, treated during gestation, or treated upon birth.

 

Anemia

Development of anemia results from an inadequate amount of red blood cells. In a healthy fetus, iron is stored during the last months of pregnancy to be used for production of red blood cells after birth. Babies born in unhealthy conditions or those born before term may not be able to properly store iron. It is essential for the mother to take the necessary vitamins during gestation, particularly folic acid. If this is not enough, the baby may be treated with iron supplements after birth.

 

Jaundice

According to high-risk obstetrician Gilbert Webb MD , this condition occurs when the liver cannot function well enough to remove waste from the blood, and this condition is more common in premature newborns or those who have incompatible blood types with their mothers. High levels of this waste product, known as bilirubin, can cause complications. There are various ways to treat the condition depending on the expertise of the physicians in care. One way to treat the baby is with phototherapy, which breaks down and eliminates the bilirubin. In more extreme circumstances, the baby may need an exchange transfusion to reduce the levels.

 

Breathing Problems

Breathing issues occur fairly frequently among newborn babies, and the most common conditions include apnea and bronchopulmonary dysplasia. Apnea occurs when there are inconsistencies in the baby’s breathing pattern. The pattern can be monitored to ensure safe breathing, and babies will be stimulated or given medicine to help. BPD occurs in babies who have immature lungs, and they may develop scarring or fluid. They may need a mechanical ventilator to assist with breathing before moving on to medications.

 

Enterocolitis

Normally affecting premature babies, this condition occurs when bowels become damaged due to decreased blood supply. Bacteria that reside in the intestines invade the affected areas and cause further damage. Babies with the condition suffer from abdominal swelling, feeding problems and other complications. Upon diagnosis, the baby will be fed intravenously until the bowel heals. If the problem becomes too severe, damaged sections of the intestines may need to be surgically removed.

 

Advancements in medicine and technology improve the knowledge about common neonatal complications. This knowledge allows more problems to be prevented beforehand or effectively handled to give babies a greater chance of health down the line.

 

About the author: A recent college graduate from University of San Francisco, Anica loves dogs, the ocean, and anything outdoor-related. She was raised in a big family, so she’s used to putting things to a vote. Also, cartwheels are her specialty. You can connect wit

 

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Christian Counseling Training: The Virtue of Purity and the Teenage Years

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Christian Counseling Training: The Virtue of Purity and the Teenage Years

“Blessed are the Pure of Heart for they shall see God” proclaims Christ.   This statement speaks volumes about the importance of the virtue of purity and its role in our spiritual salvation.   It is not a footnote or minor point for Christians to disregard as insignificant to our spiritual salvation but an essential part of our spiritual life.   Society would like to diminish the importance of this virtue as outdated to the times or unnecessary as long as one is kind to others, but the necessity of this virtue is unquestioned.   At Fatima, Our Lady told the children that many souls go to Hell due to the sins of the flesh.

This is not to scare you, or drive fear into your heart for the sins of the flesh are many and diverse.   We need to approach them carefully and understand their particular role in a teen’s life.  In some cases, a priest may not even classify a particular objectively sinful action as deadly to the soul due to subjective issue within the agent.   Hormones, confusion, ignorance and curiosity can occur during the initial teen or High school years of both girls and boys.   What would be considered as objectively sinful can have greatly reduced culpability in many teens.   This is why it is critical for loving and caring parental guidance during the puberty years; a hand that approaches delicate matters with instruction but also leniency.

I understand with the current issues within the Church, the awkward nature of confession regarding sins of the flesh for both the priest and the minor. These issues should be approached with delicacy.   This is why it is pertinent for young teens to find a trusted spiritual adviser who will not lead them astray, but give them concrete guidance regarding the sins of the flesh and the protection of purity.

With these things said, I would like to illuminate the beauty of purity through the story of St. Philomena but also approach a few delicate issues that teens may be facing regarding their own virginity or purity and how St Philomena can be a protectress to their purity.

Who Was St Philomena?

St Philomena was a teen herself!   She was a young girl who at an early age decided to offer her virginity and purity to Christ.  This was a difficult decision in the days of the early Christians.  Like our society today, purity was seen as something unnecessary.  Roman and Greek culture was saturated with sexual vices.   The threat to purity was everywhere.    From the theatre to the bathhouse, Rome and Greece was filled with not just natural sins of the flesh but an abundance of unnatural and heinous sinful actions.

Surrounded by this storm, the delicate flower of Philomena flourished.  She was an example of purity to her community and family.   She was a rare specimen for her age, must like many of us today who stand against the secular media and its glorification of lustful actions.

Do you feel it is difficult to remain pure in our society of today?   Does the constant barrage of sexual images online, on television, and in your community break down your spiritual immune system?   With raging hormones and a natural attraction to the opposite sex, these images can be confusing.   Attraction is not the sin here.  It is natural to find an image of a woman to be attractive for a boy, or an image of a man to be attractive to a girl.   This is not a sin.  However, to indulge oneself into this image or engage in like behavior as seen on television is a sin.   This is far from easy and to think it was easy for Philomena simply because she was a saint is a huge oversight.

Philomena was a young woman.  She was changing and experiencing the same desires and feelings all young people eventually experience.  She had to learn to curb these new feelings and control her emotions.  She was not free from sin or temptation and had to rely on the graces of God to protect her virtue of purity.   Undoubtedly, many nights she prayed for grace to overcome temptation.

The sins of the flesh are powerful because they correlate with our body’s natural instincts; instincts that God gave us!   These instincts are not evil in themselves but are part of who we are.   It is the devil, the great deceiver, who wishes to confuse and mislead us regarding these instincts.   He attempted to confuse Philomena, as he has attempted to confuse me or you.

Since the sins of the flesh are so powerful because they connect to our human nature, we have to learn to control them.  This of course is easier said than done!   The sin of Adam has severed our control of our passions.  Our intellect many times struggles to maintain a healthy control over our sexual urges.   This is why it is essential, we pray for purity from the Holy Spirit and beg for guidance from Mary, or St Philomena.

These urges and desires are good and healthy but if misused can be used to the delight of the evil one who wishes to mar and destroy anything good created by God.   Hence control of these emotions and desires is a critical part of the virtue of purity.   Discipline, sacrifice and control are essential atoms within the virtue of purity.

While Philomena’s virtue of purity was an initial gift to her, we cannot assume its growth and enhancement came without her consent and discipline.   Purity must be safeguarded because of its correlation with our sexual appetites.   Once we give in to an illicit thought or action, we potentially open the flood gates and weaken our spiritual immune system.

Those who find themselves captive to the sins of impurity have a difficult time escaping its grasp.  Good Christians who seek to escape it must go through intense temptations beyond anything initially experienced.  The taste of sex is strong and addictive and the devil knows how to play us against our own senses and instincts.

Many souls who pursue purity but have tasted the sexual sins fall victim not to isolated failures but repetitive falls.  Since the sins of impurity are so tied to our senses, they quickly translate from an isolated incident to a habit.   These habits are extremely hard to break and the person enslaved to these vices requires much spiritual guidance and patience.   There is no doubt, our loving Lord is patient with those who yearn to escape the sins of the flesh, but how many do not even seek to escape these sins?  How many exist in indifference or acceptance to these disordered actions?

As one erodes one’s good and certain conscience, the sins of the flesh become stronger and the voice of one’s conscience weakens to a quiet whisper.   The battle to resist becomes less and the desire becomes more.   Soon, to silence the conscience once and for all, some souls may even adopt heretical ideals that applaud sensual deviations and find no error in them.

St. Philomena never allowed the initial floodgates to open.   She hopes you do not either.   She will intercede to Christ for the perseverance of your purity.  She will also aid you if you have fallen and are in need of regaining control of your sexual appetite.

Are you willing to ask for help to preserve this wonderful gift of purity?   St Philomena went to an early death to preserve her purity and God asks much less from you.  God simply asks to try and pray for assistance when temptation arises.    Some temptations may be stronger, sometimes you may feel alone, but God is strengthening you with the individual abilities to cope and overcome impure adversity.

Philomena’s struggles led to a horrible martyr’s death at the hands of the Roman Emperor himself.  Philomena’s beauty was unparalleled and many men desired her.  Upon a trip from Greece to Rome, the Emperor had spoken to her father, a statesman, regarding the beauty of his daughter.  He requested that her father hand her over to him.  The father, not a Christian, was over joyed to have such imperial favor and immediately agreed, but Philomena who had given herself to Christ would not partake in the impure and sensuous desires of the Emperor.

She refused any of the Emperor’s impure advances.  The Emperor was enraged that his sexual desires were not fulfilled and had her beaten and imprisoned.   Yet Philomena remained in her cell.  Through the grace of God, the virtue of purity was strong within her delicate soul, that not even the sexual advances of an Emperor could sway her conviction.   Not even the numerous promises of wealth and luxury promised by the Emperor could persuade her to abandon her God.

It is easy to think these temptations did not stir in her soul, but what would you think if a powerful individual with wealth and riches wished to give you the world?  Not only wealth, but every pleasure affordable?  Yet, due to some characteristic which separates the saints from the mundane, heroic virtue manifested itself; a virtue so extreme and heroic that it reflected the goodness of God and his grace that filled Philomena.

The Emperor’s impure obsession with Philomena grew and with his obsession also grew his hate.  Lucifer through the Emperor sought to destroy the virtue of purity within Philomena and continued his assault on her.   The Emperor pushed to extremes continued to have Philomena beaten, only to discover the next day that her bruises had vanished.   Our Lord, according to tradition, had sent the angels to administer to his daughter.

Pushed by insanity, the Emperor had Philomena ordered to be executed, yet on two separate occasions, Philomena’s martyrdom was delayed by miraculous events.   God chose to use the purity of Philomena as an example to many and He sought to show the world the goodness of Philomena.   On the first occasion, arrows were shot at Philomena, but to the disbelief and astonishment of many, they reversed flow and struck the very archers who fired them.   The second occasion, Philomena was cast into the Tiber river with an anchor tied around her waist, but yet again to the astonishment of the guards, she was lifted from the river by angels.  Many souls converted to Christianity that day.

Incensed more than ever, the Emperor demanded that Philomena be beheaded.   It was on that day, that Philomena was finally given reprieve from her torments and as a pure heart, allowed to see the splendor of her Spiritual Groom.

What are you willing to do to preserve your purity and virginity?  God may not ask us to die a martyr’s death but He does ask us to live a pure life.  St Philomena lived a pure life and is an excellent example to follow.   We can emulate St Philomena by chasing away impure thoughts, remaining close to our Lady and always focusing on Christ.  We can also wear the red chord of Philomena.  This red chord ties around one’s waist and reminds one of the necessity of purity.

St Philomena, pray for us

If you are interested in learning more about Christian Counseling Training, then please review the program

 

Mark Moran, MA

 

 

 

Foods that Can Improve Your Brain Power

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Health Care Life Coaching and Important Foods For the Brain

We have all come across various posts that advise us about the best foods that can help build muscles, lose weight or even those that we should avoid. All these help us to bring out the external beauty of our body and make us look good and presentable. But, what about the necessary nutrients that our body needs? The most important part being the brain. You need to be determined to be that amazing “Beauty with Brains”! And for the guys; make sure you  build up your brains too.

It’s not only the external beauty that matters. You need to be clever enough and brainy to handle every situation in life. You need not learn about the historical World wars, neither would you be asked the distance between the two countries. But, all you have is a mind that works well and is alert enough to respond to situations. Now, this is where we would see some natural foods that are found to be extremely helpful in improving the brain power.

  1. Nuts: Vitamin E plays a very important role in the functioning of the brain. This Vitamin helps in the prevention of the Cognitive decline. You can have Walnuts and Almonds, as they are a great source of Vitamin E. Cashews and Sunflower seeds are known to boost the serotonin levels and thus lower stress. If you are not quite sure of which nuts you should eat, the best way to remember walnut, is its shape. The walnut resembles the brain. It contains high amounts of the Omega 3 Fatty Acids that are also beneficial for the brain.
  2. Eggs: The egg yolks contain high amounts of Choline. This nutrient is known to help in strengthening the memory and reduce the effects of age related mental decline. It is also found to be helpful in improving the communication between the brain cells. Thus, eating one egg per day is a standard way of staying healthy and keeping your brain healthy too.
  3. Pumpkin Seeds and Peas: Pumpkin seeds are usually a part of the waste we throw away after cleaning a pumpkin. But, did you know that these seeds are a rich source of Zinc? Peas too are a rich source. Why does our body need zinc? Zinc is known to be a powerful nutrient for memory building and thinking. It regulates the communication between the neurons and the hippocampus, the part that is responsible for higher learning function and memory.
  4. Green Tea: Tea is a refreshing drink that is now consumed in different parts of the world. The nutritional composition in Green tea helps prevent the breakdown of acetylcholine. The acetylcholine is a chemical that deals with the memory and is usually less or absent in people suffering with the Alzheimer’s Disease. Both; black and green tea are found to be effective for an Alzheimer’s patient. But, the Green Tea is considered to be more effective because of the additional antioxidants that it contains.
  5. Fish: Fish and fish oil is known to be  among the greatest sources of the Omega 3 fatty acids that are needed by the body. It not only helps in proper functioning of the brain, but also contains some anti inflammatory substances that the body needs. Therefore, consuming fish, or even fish oil, will contribute towards a healthy mind and body.
  6. Dark Chocolate: This yummy dessert is indeed a good and healthy food that we all can eat with lots of love. Prefer dark chocolates that contain at least 70% cocoa. It increases the blood flow to the brain and prevents it from early ageing. Chocolates also contain high amounts of antioxidants and help improve one’s mood. Thus, an ounce of dark bitter chocolate every day is acceptable.
  7. 7.      Blueberries: These tiny blueberries are a rich source of antioxidants and help protect the brain from oxidative stress that is usually caused by the accumulated free radicals in the body. These berries also enhance the memory and improve the learning abilities. They also prevent age related issues from affecting the brain and thus prevent the signs of Alzheimer’s Disease.
  8. 8.      Broccoli: The Broccoli is the best alternative for an egg. Vegetarians can prefer consuming Broccoli instead of an egg. This too, is rich in Choline and thus helps in improving the memory and prevents the mental decline caused due to ageing. Apart from this, Broccoli is also a rich source of Vitamin K that helps in increasing the speed of the brain functions and improves memory abilities. You can eat some 2 cups for about 3 to 4 times a week.
  9. 9.      Carrots:  We all have heard about carrots being good for the eyes. But, they are good for the brain too. A compound called luteolin helps reduce age related memory deficits and inflammation in the brain. You can thus have a lot of carrots now. They will help you improve your eyesight and your brain too.
  10. Lentils: If you are on a look out for food that will give you enough of folate and Vitamin B, lentils are the best sources you can consume. They help in boosting the brain power like none other and reduce the effects of amino acids on the brain.

These foods will surely contribute well towards the well being of the brain. Many of these also contribute towards the overall health of the body. Thus, consuming them will surely help you in maintaining a healthy body and a healthier brain. Go ahead a grab those healthy bits for a healthy mind and body.

By James Hundson

 

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AIHCP

 

The 5 Most In-Demand Healthcare Careers

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

The 5 Most In-Demand Healthcare Careers

Even with difficult economic times now and in the foreseeable future, healthcare personnel continue to find jobs faster than just about any other industry. Baby boomers are aging, and their children have had their children. Who is getting hired at such staggering rates?

Nurses

For the last 20 years it has been nurses, and for at least the next 10 years it will still be nurses. Job openings for nurses are expected to number 500,000 in the next three years. Baby boomers will be needing more nurses and more of the baby boomer nurses will be retiring. The fastest growth areas for nursing appear to be in outpatient care facilities, home health care and physicians’ offices.

Medical Assistants

These are support personnel for doctors and nurses that perform both clinical and administrative functions. They’ll take a patient’s vital signs, administer medications and injections, and enter them on medical records. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, opportunities in this field are expected to increase 29 percent by 2022. Those interested in a career as a medical assistant should pursue an online health education degree, which typically requires the completion of an internship before the degree is awarded.

Medical Records Technologists

With the aging of both the baby boomers and their children, somebody has to maintain all of those medical records. This field has become much more complex than it was 20 years ago, primarily due to electronic record systems. They’re mostly employed in hospitals, long term care facilities and doctors’ offices. The Bureau of Labor expects a 30% increase in these jobs to 2022. There are programs that offer an associate’s degree in this field.

Medical Lab Technologists

These technologists work under the supervision of a lab manager and senior medical technologist. They perform laboratory tests on specimens. A large percentage of decisions made by physicians are based on medical laboratory test results. Job growth projected through 2018 is at a 22 percent increase. A four year bachelor’s degree is required for this position.

Physical Therapists

There are more jobs for physical therapists than available physical therapists. There is an expected 36 percent increase in demand for them through 2022. Although training is extensive, the career pays very well. Physical therapy assistants are also in demand and will be in the future.

The job forecast in the healthcare industry is robust. The demand for quality healthcare continues to grow with more jobs than personnel to fill them.

By Marlena Stoddard

 

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The Church, the Eucharist and the Broken

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Christian Counseling Certification Program: The Church, Eucharist and the Broken

Just this week, the Synod of Bishops met in Rome to discuss pastoral care of the family, including pastoral care of broken families due to divorce.  It also examined hot issues regarding the homosexual unions and adoption.  Some of these issues were Catholic only issues that did not relate to Orthodox or Protestant Christian communities, but the theme of thought I think reflects upon all of Christianity.  It represents what view we will have as a people of God in regards to modern problems and modern ideas.

Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner

This has been an idea in thought but so little exercised in action.  Strict regulations, out dated legalisms, prohibitions and the painting of a stigma upon certain classes of people has divided the church from those who sit in the front row to those who hide in the back row in shame.   Many of those pushed away from the faith have felt no choice but to flee in shame and disgrace, others have left defiantly due to the hypocrisy of the hierarchy; a hierarchy who has its own moral issues but so gladly points out the problems of the masses.

Christ came to save sinners and he expects us to pastorally care for sinners.   Christ, while on earth, was not seen arguing among the sinners but arguing among the “church goers” and leaders of the Temple.  The Pharisees and their hypocrisy is what incensed Christ the most.  Why would today be any different?   Ministers and their Mega Churches, Bishops and their lavish residences, and moral corruption among those who supposedly  lead us in prayer are in the headlines.  Pope Francis has seen these errors and by example has pushed a reform of simplicity for leaders, but the percentages of corruption are still far too high.

So, love the sinner, but what does that entail?

The Liberal Agenda

The liberal agenda would wish for us to believe that loving the sinner means full acceptance of their life style.  This movement hopes to brand anyone who stands up against the sin itself as a bigot.  Harsh words as “discrimination” are labeled upon anyone with enough integrity to set moral boundaries regarding liturgical or church worship.  These individuals who set boundaries are seen as oppressors to progress.

The liberal agenda wishes to transform the faith to fit its needs.  It is not about loving the sinner, but also loving the sin.  This is not true pastoral care.  Pastoral care pities the situation and abandons outdated legalisms, but it does not sacrifice truth and spiritual admonishment at the cost of physical comfort.   While it is true Christ did embrace  sinners, one must also remember, he also told them to “sin no more”

So what is the best approach?

Some Suggestions

First, we need to truly and really present the ideal of loving the sinner and hating the sin.  We need to speak more as a loving parent than an angry guardian to those who have fallen away from the faith.  We need to be more understanding of their plight, their circumstances, their feelings and needs.   We need to dispel condemnation and outdated legalisms but project mercy and forgiveness.

We also need to change, especially in the Catholic Church.  Too many times, the Eucharist is seen as a trophy to be denied those who fail to comply.  While protection of the Eucharist as a sacrament is critical and proper reception a prerequisite within the heart of all sinners, we still must realize the Eucharist is Christ himself. (from a Catholic perspective).   If Catholics truly believe this, then we must also be open to seeing the Eucharist as a source of healing for sinners.  Christ himself said let the sinners come to me!   To openly forbid Christ to the masses is comparable to when the apostles tried to shield their tired master from his flock.  Did Christ not rebuke them for this?

The Church needs to reform its standards on reception of the Eucharist for divorced and remarried couples.  This does not mean that the Church is recognizing divorce, or re-marriage without annulment, but it is letting sinners receive the sacrament.   Yes, the Church can educate the individual not to receive to one’s own damnation.  The Church can teach the people that one needs the sacrament of confession in case of mortal sin and should keep their soul clean for the Eucharist, but the legalistic procedures need to be eliminated and a more pastoral approach incorporated into theology, sermons and daily life.

How many times has a person who has not gone to confession in case of mortal sin, fled the Eucharist, or laid their head low in the back of the church?  The fear and scandal of their sin has pushed them away, but they are told to stay away from our Lord who can forgive them.   At that moment, fear and regulation should not exist, but love and mercy; the love and mercy of the Eucharist.  We must understand mortal sin exists, but death to the soul occurs when one openly rejects and hates Christ and has no room for change.  An incidental action, not life style, should and does not destroy a remorse soul.  True remorse exists in many re-married, divorced, homosexual or causal sinner’s lives.   They should not be denied the Eucharist but should go forward, with remorse and intent of sacramental confession when time permits.

The Eucharist is for sinners.  No one is perfect.  Christ related the story of the Pharisee and the sinner.  How many of us see ourselves as paradigms of our Christian community and boast of our accomplishments or what parish board we are on or supervise?  How many of us in those capacities are infected with a nasty and petty attitude towards others?  Gossip, jealousy or pride overrun many communities or parishes with such individuals.  Yet, these individuals are worthy to receive and partake but the sinners in the back of the church who acknowledge their sins but due to legalistic norms, fear reception of the Eucharist are not?  Did not Christ say that God heard the prayer of the man in the back of the temple before that of the Pharisee?

So the Church, without compromising the sanctity of the sacrament, must also approach reception of the Eucharist from a pastoral view as well that does not undermine sanctity but emphasizes also that the Eucharist is Christ and that Christ is love and mercy.

I am not condoning that the Eucharist should not be respected or that anyone can receive the sacred Body and Blood of Christ, (symbolic for non Catholics), but the Church must approach the many legalistic obstacles to reception and re-evaluate.

 

So Where to Draw the Line?

We know liberals have taken the initial write up of the synod as an open invitation to change Church doctrine on divorce and homosexual relations, but the Holy Spirit has closed these things off, even within the revisions, the Holy Spirit manifested himself.   Under the guidance of Holy Spirit, Pope Francis is approaching many things more pastoral and Christ like, but there still must be a line.  Understanding, mercy and forgiveness can be applied, but truth must still be guarded.

This truth lies in the fact that many remarried couples, those who co-habitate, or those who live in unnatural and homosexual relationships are not repentant.  They have no intention of reforming their lives nor feel any guilt or sorrow for their past.  For those who wish to advertise and promote their illicit behavior, then those should not be permitted the Eucharist.  If they sadly wish to leave the confines of the Church over these illicit actions, then the Church must allow them to leave of their own free will.  We can only prayer for them.

What I ask is simply to leave it to the discretion of a case by case basis to the parish priest.  For those who are knowingly in cohabitation, remarried or in homosexual relationships, then allow the priest to determine the rule or norm for individual cases.  Only the parish priest would know the situation and who is truly repentant or struggling with vice.  He would also know those who may have no firm desire to change.

As for remarried couples, divorced and homosexual, the choice to receive should be open to them but with strong guidelines.   There are so many subjective elements to why someone is divorced or why someone remarried but denial of the Eucharist should not be one of the punishments.  Many individuals who remarried long ago, may now feel the guilt but the reality of their lives together with another person, while not condoned, should at least be understood.  Maybe the grace of the sacrament and frequent confession would be the best thing for these individuals?   Leaving them at the curb, as broken, and denying them the Eucharist is not helping their soul.  Again, let the pastor determine the situation on a case by case basis.

But how do we know the true intent of people?  We do not, that is why until we walk in someone’s else shoes, we cannot judge worthiness of the Eucharist for one or the other, for if we judge, then we realize none of us are worthy to receive the Eucharist but only through the friendship of Christ.

Conclusion

So in conclusion, we are trapped by two extremes.  One of a legalistic outdated system that over emphasizes awe and a liberal indifferent system that emphasizes no respect for the Eucharist.  The middle ground is respect but also pastoral common sense that views the Eucharist as God, Creator, and Omnipotent Being, but also as Father, Brother, Savior and Friend.

We cannot change the sin, but we can better love the sinner.  In many ways the hierarchy has failed in these cases, and in many more cases, the liberal war drum of modernism has echoed through the halls, but we must maintain a middle ground that is faithful to the teachings of the church and also open to the ministry of Christ which is understanding, mercy and love.  We as a Church must remove the Pharisaical Legalisms of the Pre-Vatican II Church and see Christ more personally in what we consider proper for reception of the Eucharist.

Whether Protestant, Catholic or Orthodox, these issues of the modern family affect our Churches.  How should we incorporate non-traditional families without condoning their sin?  This is difficult.  I laid a few suggestions above for the Catholic Church in eve of the Synod in Rome, but I am sure other congregations have different protocols.   Whatever the protocol, I know two things.  First, we cannot alter dogma for comfort, and second, we cannot allow legalistic outdated laws determine pastoral care.

If you would like to learn more about our Christian Counseling Certification Program, then please review

Mark Moran, MA

Grief Counseling Training: Secondary Losses

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

Grief Counseling Training:  Secondary Losses

In grief counseling training, many hear the term secondary losses.  What does this term mean?  A secondary loss is something that results or stems from the primary loss and is usually not foreseen until it is experienced by the griever.   Certified grief counselors need to be aware of their clients life and expect and even forewarn the griever of these unexpected losses that may result from the primary loss.

A very good example is a widow.  Her primary loss is her husband.  This huge void in her life will alter it in many ways.  These new alterations are in many cases examples of secondary losses.   Less income is one of the biggest things a widow may face, especially younger widows.  Another secondary loss would be the lack of help around the home.  Leaky faucets, the yard not being mowed or even the simple task of taking out the trash can become reminders of the loss and also an additional hardship to a widow.  In contrast, a widower may have to learn to cook his own meals after work or have to pay to have laundry done.  Within these classical  and traditional norms of husband and wife duties, we can see a loss and a void created by that loss.   Modern families may face less traditional issues but in any relationship, traditional or modern, usually a particular set of duties is best dealt with by one spouse or the other.  When these duties fall upon the grieving spouse, it can become a hardship.

These losses trickle down to the very core of any relationship that is lost.   As we continue with the example of a widow or widower, consider even the smallest thing.  For instance, the loss of income can also affect one’s social life.  When a group of friends wish to attend a movie, perhaps the widow or widower due to tighter budget cannot attend with friends?  Again this is an example of a secondary loss and a new way of adapting to the primary loss is a tighter budget.  Health can also be a big issue.  Loss of health care or coverage, or poor diet can all lead to future problems that are a result from the primary loss.

Another example is a single parent who has very little support except for his or her parents.  Many grandparents supply helpful hands to single parents who work.  Imagine if the grandparents or lone grandparent died?  The sting of grief is present, but what of the grandchild?  Now the single and working parent must find a good day care or baby sitter which reduces the quality of care and costs additional funds.

Like dominoes, every aspect of one’s life can be affected in different ways from the primary loss.  Secondary losses even linger long after the primary loss has been dealt with and adapted to.  The last domino to fall from the initial loss may be felt many years later.  An anniversary, a birthday, or a wedding.   If anything, secondary losses teach us the value of the person or thing lost and the price of that loss.   Yes, we need to adapt and adjust, but we can never forgot the precious person or thing we lost, and secondary losses remind us of the importance people or things play in our life.

We need to be thankful for every person in our lives and evaluate how our lives would be with out them.  Their emotional support, financial support, or favors that they so generously hand out to us.  Imagine our life without them and then you can imagine not only the pain of loss, but the secondary losses to our own life.

If you are interested in becoming trained as a Grief Counselor or would like Grief Counseling Training, then please review the program.

Mark Moran, MA, GC-C

 

Certified Health Care Life Coach: How can Adults Eradicate the Obesity in Kids

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

The startling increase in the rate of obesity in children has worried the WHO (world health organization). The kids with extra pounds in their bodies tend to suffer from various physical ailments. They are also prone to the risk of developing asthma and heart diseases. The obese children get affected in an emotional way because of their excessive weight. They tend to lose their confidence due to frequent teasing at schools and public places. Even if it doesn’t happen, they become shy and do not wish to step out of the house.

Lack of activity leads to increase in their fat and weight. Obesity makes the child physically and mentally incompetent. Often they are excluded from the school activities, which make them lonesome and depressed. If the feeling persists then these young kids would start hating their body which may lead to some dangerous situation at a later stage.

Prospects of Physical Activities

According to a research conducted in the year 2012, parents revealed the chances of getting their kids involved in physical activities to decrease their fat, and vice-versa increase their self-confidence. The concerned age was from 0-8 tears. However in 2013 there was an improvisation seen in the health of kids by 61 percent.

The years 2012-13 witnessed the chances amongst the young children to get involved in the physical activities like sports and swimming. It gradually rose according to the age-group. The children who were benefitted by the exercises were mostly from American Indians, children of natives of Alaska, Arab and American children, and the young ones of Latin and Spanish parents. Amongst this brood the adults figured more chances of white kids involving in the physical activities, and getting better results than the kids from other nationality or tribe. The reason was unknown but these gave chance of studying the life of colored people in a better way.

Kids suffering from obesity also sometimes suffer from speech problems. They might stutter or cannot speak the exact words. To heal this problem the speech pathologists Newcastle provide verbal communication reviews and healing to the child. The aspect of family focused therapy is used by the speech pathologists Newcastle so that both the child and the parents get attuned with goals and concept of speech therapy sessions.

Reduced Ratios of Obesity

Fresh surveys and trends amplify the fact that the rising risk of obesity in children has slowly reduced. In the year 2011 the ratio of reduction in obesity moderately decreased by 0.3% in the kids aged from 2-5 years. Similarly, the kids suffering from their weight problems indulged in the physical activities and got better health aspect, it reduced the obesity problem by one percent.

Encouraging Analysis

There were appreciated efforts made by the grown-ups to eradicate this problem by developing recreation centers, sports-club and parks for kids. The survey further emphasized the investment in organizing camps for children, and gymnasium for those living in the lower income group. Parents, teachers and other responsible adults working with children encouraged the children to indulge in activities like sports, hiking, swimming which helped in reducing the fat cells from the body and thereby increased the power of immune system.

Autho’s Bio

Jenna is a certified music therapist who uses music to heal the autism in children. She often writes blogs for health topics. 

If your interested in Coaching and helping others find better diets, then consider becoming a certified Health Care Life Coach.  Qualified professionals can apply and after completion of required coursework can become certified with AIHCP

AIHCP earns BBB Accreditation

Posted on by Dominick Flarey

The American Institute of Health Care Professionals Earns BBB Accreditation

This week, The American Institute of Health Care Professionals announced its recent Accreditation by the BBB of Columbiana, Mahoning and Trumbull counties.  As a BBB Accredited Business, The American Institute of Health Care Professionals is dedicated to promoting trust in the marketplace.

 

According to BBB reports by Princeton Research, seven in ten consumers say they are more likely to buy from a company designated as a BBB Accredited Business.  The BBB is a resource for the public, providing objective, unbiased information about businesses.

 

“We are pleased to be a BBB Accredited Business because we value building trust with our customers,” said Dominick Flarey.  “Our BBB Accreditation give our customers confidence in our commitment to maintaining high ethical standards of conduct.”

 

BBB Accredited Businesses must adhere to the BBB’s Standards of Trust, a comprehensive set of policies, procedures and best practices representing trustworthiness in the marketplace.  The Standards call for building trust, embodying integrity, advertising honestly, telling the truth, being transparent, honoring promises, being responsive and safeguarding privacy.

 

About The American Institute of Health Care Professionals

AIHCP is a health care professional organization dedicated to helping health care professionals earn continuing education and certifications.  The fields range from Grief Counseling to Nursing Case Management and include certification opportunities for nurses, social workers, counselors, ministers, pastoral care givers, funeral workers and other health care professionals.  As a professional organization we offer certifications to qualified professionals.

 

About The BBB

The Better Business Bureau’s mission is to be the leader in advancing marketplace trust.  The BBB accomplishes this mission by creating a community of trustworthy businesses, setting standards for marketplace trust, encouraging and supporting best practices, celebrating marketplace role models and denouncing substandard marketplace behavior.

 

Businesses that earn BBB Accreditation contractually agree and adhere to the organization’s high standards of ethical business behavior.  The BBB is the preeminent resource to turn for objective, unbiased information on businesses and charities.

 

The BBB of Columbiana, Mahoning and Trumbull counties can be contacted at 330.744.3111 or info@youngstown.bbb.org.

 

If you would also like more information about The American Institute of Health Care Professionals, then please review our site.

 

Mark Moran, MA, SCC-C, GC-C

Assistant Executive Director