Anger Management Consultant Certification Article on Anger and Couples

Anger can ruin relationships if it is not properly dispersed and understood.  When someone becomes angry with a significant other they may do one of two things.  They may allow the anger to surface, or allow it to dive deep within oneself in the form of anxiety.  Hence many live with the chose of anger or anxiety.  One may not believe it, but anger is the better option.  Why?  Simply put, anger is not something evil in itself but something that allows others to know we are uncomfortable or something is not right.  The reality is anger is good if utilized properly in a constructive way especially in relationships.  When couples properly utilize anger, they can use this important emotion to help resolve arguments instead of inflame them.

Anger as an emotion is a result of the fight or flight response.  The body tightens up, blood pressure increases and the heart beat increases.  This allows the body to prepare for confrontation possibly.  While stressors and irritants can cause this, it is obviously not good to always get angry but to have an appropriate response to stress and allow anger to constructively look to repair the issue.  Anger in this way can help relationships.


Couples should never use anger as a way to punish but as a way to resolve and forgive by exposing the issue and preventing future issues. Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consultant Certification


Anger can help relationships when constructive in multiple ways.  It allows one to express feelings and let others know one has been hurt.  It gives individuals an understanding of one’s boundaries.  Finally by releasing anger, one can sooner forget and forgive.  Those who harbor these negative emotions, fuel a deeper outburst later and find little resolution but only resentment.

Anger that is misused and seeking to punish via quiet or outburst can cause multiple issues to self and relationships.  When misused besides the obvious chance of violence and hurtful words, it also leaves one with weakened self esteem in ability to control emotion.  When looking to punish it also hides the true self because one is either punishing with indifference or verbal assault.  This bitterness weakens communication. Silent anger that looks to punish creates distance and pushes others away but also causes a host of internal physical issues.

When anger is utilized properly it looks to not punish but again find justice or healing.  It empowers one to stand up for oneself.  It helps one communicate issues and break through destructive patterns by another that hurt you.  It asks for a mutual resolution and a potential way to find forgiveness and future prevention of damaging behavior.

Anger within relationships usually though causes multiple issues.  Individuals do not utilize anger in a constructive way but usually in a destructive way.  This may not even be physical or mental abuse, but the reality that couples who argue tend to hurt each other by not understanding how to utilize their anger to resolve.  Instead it becomes a competition of who is right or wrong or who cannot admit they did wrong.

Right or wrong, win or lose, egos need to be tossed aside and the true question needs to be asked in regards to whom was hurt.

This is rarely the resolution though but instead anger fuels arguments.  Assumptions, disapprovals, judgements and accusations against one another can heat the moment and elevate the argument to higher levels, as each become defensive and more angry by the minute.

It is important to remember to avoid assumptions.  Partners should ask how one feels, instead of assuming.  Instead of accusatory statements such as “you”, it is important to use terms such as “I feel”,  It is best not to blame and accuse and label but to listen, praise and forgive.

An argument again is not about who wins or who ultimately is right but resolution.  Sometimes anger that is not constructive can send an argument into other levels of animosity instead of constructively exposing the issue and allowing couples to discuss and identify key issues.


Anger not discussed can cause resentment. Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification and see if it meets your academic and professional goals


AIHCP offers an online and independent Anger Management Consultant Certification, as well as a Stress Management Certification.  Both programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification.  Those interested in Anger Management can utilize the certification to help in a variety of counseling fields and Anger Management classes.  Anger Management is key in helping couples find resolution and forgiveness.

Related Topics

Healing Anxiety with Herbs by Harold Bloomfield, MD.   Chapter 27 deals extensively with anger management and couples

7 Guidelines to Help Couples Manage Conflict by Bernard Golden.  Please click here

How Couples Can Use Anger by Richard Joelson.  Please click here


Anger Management Consulting Certification Article on Anger Within

Anger issues can be existent prior to an actual trigger.  Some individuals are constantly upset or angry over things due to mental makeup.  It can be as simple as OCD or more complex but individuals can experience an angry nature due to psychological makeup.  There is help for these mental issues through counseling and possibly medication to lower the emotional symptoms.

Symptoms of anger are common with some mental maladies. Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification


The article, “Feeling angry all the time? Here’s what might have triggered it” from the “TimesofIndia” looks closer at anger and how it overflows for some people.  The article states,

“Anger is an emotion that comes naturally to almost everyone. While the cause of anger or aggression may differ in people, it will only lead to rage and aggressive expression. Although some people learn the art of staying in control and keeping their minds calm, there are certain factors that can cause anger issues which are hard to tackle.”

To read the entire article, please click here

Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification and see if the program meets your academic and professional goals.  The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Anger Management.

Some individuals do face anger on a more consistent basis to biological and emotional issues.  These individuals need counseling and help for the root issue.  Anger Management can also help


Anger Management Certification Article on Conflict Resolution

Stressors and change create grief and anger.  How we manage our anger and grief in relationship to stressors with other people is critical to our social interaction with others.  For better communication, health and better social relationships, conflict resolution is critical.

Conflict resolution involves better communication skills, control of emotion due to stress and loss, patience and understanding.  In conflict resolution, stress management and anger management classes, individuals need to identify what type of behavior their possess in their interaction with other people.

Conflict resolution brings out a peaceful but effective solution for two differing parties
Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification


Assertive behaviors are the healthiest of the behaviors.  They establish boundaries, respect self, respect the other person, and meet one’s needs in a healthy way.   Non assertive behaviors on the other hand deny the wishes and needs of self at the expense of others.  There is a lack of boundaries and ability to respect one self over the needs of others.

Aggressive behavior is a selfish behavior.  It turns to conflict when establishing boundaries and the needs of others.  It does not respect the needs of others nor the feelings of others when establishing itself in a conflict.

For example, an assertive behavior at a restaurant would return an ordered item that was ill prepared.  It would so in a civil and polite way, describing the issues and find resolution.  A non-assertive behavior would meekly accept the discrepancy in the order and say nothing for fear of causing a scene.  An aggressive behavior would demand the order be fixed without politeness and be filled with a litany of insults

Obviously, assertive behavior is the most social, healthy, and effective behaviors during conflict.  They meet the need of the person but also find resolution in a polite and effective way.  One can be assertive through non verbal clues, or verbal clues.  How one stands, speaks in tone, and looks at a person are parts of an assertive personality.  They lack dismissive behaviors or aggressive and angry body movements.

Verbally, an assertive behavior communicates.  They describe the issue, express feelings, specify what is needed, and refer to consequences.  In doing so, obviously, listening is also key but also elaborating on one’s needs is also key.  How we communicate is key to reducing anger, stress, anxiety and violence.

It is important when resolving conflicts to use specific types of words.   The words “And” and but” are important ways to express conflict.  Instead of eliminating the feelings of others via the word “but “it is better to include the word “and” as a way to address and not eliminate another’s point of view.

Another verbal cue in resolving conflicts is to avoid the pronoun “you” when addressing someone else. Instead, use the pronoun “I” as not to be accusatory towards another person when pointing something out.  As with “you”, avoid direct accusatory words such as “why” which can force a person with an opposing view on the defensive.

How we communicate via speech is key to resolving conflict.


If one incorporates understanding, patience, and kindness with an assertive personality, they can better communicate and address conflict issues that emerge due to anger and stress.  It is imperative to be able to communicate and resolve issues of conflict in a civil but effective way.  It is not only socially better but also best for health and wellbeing.  The less conflict, the less stress, anxiety and anger

Please also review AIHCP’s Stress Management Consulting Program as well as AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting program and see if it matches your academic and professional goals.  Qualified professionals can earn a four-year certification and help others deal with stress and anger through successful conflict resolution

Anger Management Consulting Certification Article on Controlling Words

Many times people say things in anger they regret.  Words can damage relationships permanently.  It is important to watch one’s tongue when in anger and never allow emotion to get the best of oneself when dealing with other people.  Learning to what to say when angry is critical.  It is a life skill that can help one stay out of trouble and not hurt family and friends.

It is sometimes best to talk when angry after reflection. Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification


The article, “The Thing To Say Every Time You’re Angry” by Laura Vanderkam looks into what is best to say when anger overtakes.  She states,

“In this angry, anxious, and polarized time, it’s easy to lash out, whether on social media or at people in your real life. And we often end up wishing we didn’t:One survey found that a majority of social media users had posted something they regretted.”

To read the entire article, please click here

Learning to avoid the conflict with immediate verbal slashes is critical to good relationships with others. Learning how to walk away and say what gives you more time to reflect is key to not allowing emotion to dictate words you may later regret.

Please also review AIHCP’s Anger Management Consulting Certification.  Qualified professionals can learn how to help others how to manage their emotions and control anger.

Anger Management Consulting Certification on Anger and the Pandemic

Usually war, disaster or tragedy unite, but the COVID 19 pandemic has managed to divide the country.  On one side there are citizens who are obeying restrictions and social distancing and on the other side, there are individuals who are openly defying the restrictions.  This dangerous mentality adds to the division that display political fault lines simply by wearing a mask or not wearing one.   This also fuels an already uneasy political landscape between Trump and the Democratic Party, and for that matter most mainstream individuals.   The response to the disaster has only enraged more as everyone looks to point the finger.

Covid19 pandemic has led to political divide instead of unity against the virus. Some minority groups see the fight against the virus as a campaign against their rights. This has led to political anger between maskers and non maskers


This unrest and fear across the nation has led to increase signs of political anger.  Protests and armed open carry as a sign of intimidation towards others who support  science and the medical field is perplexing.  While the shut downs have hurt everyone economically, the irrational response of anger out of fear has engulfed the nation.  Individuals demanding their rights over the inconvenience of regulations imposed by the the state are becoming more and more angry.   They are channeling their anger of  not wearing  mask into a political movement against state control and a secret agenda.

Others in response are becoming increasingly angry with the absurdity of not wearing a mask or questioning the apparent danger of the virus.  This has led to conflicts and showdowns between maskers and non maskers.  Without good leadership in Washington, which is constantly sending mixed signals, individuals are becoming even more angry.

It is unfortunate that political divide and anger has even poured into the medical and scientific realms where safety against the virus is now questioned.   As this continues, individuals must keep their calm.  Wear the masks, keep distance and do not allow anger to overwhelm oneself when seeing someone who blatantly disregards safety due to their misdirected and unsound anger.  Two angry minds do not solve the problem.

Protests against the economic shutdown are spread across the country. This fueling of anger from the political field makes fighting the virus more difficult


However, fear has not only engulfed the social sphere but also home life.  Again where families should come together, one is discovering cases of domestic violence.   New schedules, unemployment frustration, cabin fever, and enforcing pandemic rules are a stress on families.  Many families are also gripped with fear and that fear can turn into outbursts.  This is even a more dangerous situation in households where domestic violence is already an ingredient of everyday life.

Overall, many Americans are acting calm outside and inside their homes, but as a nation, we collectively must remain calm.  One cannot allow fear of the virus, anger over the situation and stress of new guidelines to lead to conflict and confrontation.  It is far easier to become emotional but if everyone follows the guidelines, ignores the fringe minority, and works together as a family and community then this crisis will slowly go away.

Homes in quarantine with a history of domestic violence also face anger issues.


Wearing masks, washing hands, and social distancing can help protect families from infection.   If everyone tries their best, then spread can be minimized.  As the country starts to re-open, new challenges will emerge and new cases, but everyone must not allow fear, stress and outside noise distract them from the task at hand.  This is going to be a long war on the virus and if the correct mindset is adopted, we can limit fear, reduce false expectations and face challenges with a sound mind.

Anger is something we do not need added to the already volatile situation.  Frustration over the situation is understandable but we cannot allow that frustration to turn into an anger that makes one  become enemies with one another or take political agendas over science and medical advice.

While dealing with these issues, please also review our Anger Management Consulting Certification Program.  The program is great for individuals who deal with anger issues or professionals seeking to become certified in the area of Anger Management.  Qualified professionals can become certified and the program is online and independent study.  The program leads to a four year certification which can be renewed every four years.

Please also review our Anger Management Consulting Certification Program and see if it meets your professional and academic needs


In the meantime, remember to stay calm, follow medical advice, and face the crisis one day at a time.  That is the best way to deal with the anger that is surrounding everyone due to this crisis without allowing it to enrage yourself.