It is easy to displace emotion. When it is more convenient, or less impactful, one may become angry with someone who is not the cause of the irritation. When grieving, it is sometimes also easier to take it out on the person presenting the bad news. Like all defense mechanisms, they can happen at the unconscious level.
Displacement of emotion upon others can occur in grief. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
It is important to understand emotion and grieving and when helping others, to expect a displacement of emotion. It is important to be understanding and ready to forgive when one acts emotionally during grief.
The article, “Understanding Displacement While Grieving” from Eleanor Haley and “Whats Your Grief” takes a closer look at displacement and how to deal with it as the griever and the one supporting the griever. The article states,
“Sometimes the displacement is obvious – you know exactly when and why it is happening. Other times you just find yourself being more irritable, annoyed, or angry at the people around you, even when they have done nothing wrong. It can be complicated because often your rational-brain knows that they haven’t done anything, while your emotional-brain can’t help but lash out. ”
When dealing with emotions, it can become complicated and it is important as grief counselors to know that people react differently to grief and an array of emotions can flow. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it meets your professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
Grief is a reaction to any loss. Sometimes this loss is focused on death but injuries and loss of capabilities or limbs are also a loss that many deal with daily. Losing a limb is tragic and is a loss that involves a long adaptation period. Numerous secondary losses stem from the initial trauma and pain.
Loss of a limb or other body part can take a long time to recover from. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
Phantom pains can haunt one well after the initial accident, as well as emotional distress. The inability to do walk, or hold things, or do things prior the accident haunt the individual. Hobbies, activities and other events become cold memories of a life once was. In addition to this, one’s own self image and self esteem can be affected. Feeling less than whole and new forms of transportation or clothing may be required. These changes can cause grief and in some cases depression.
It is difficult to cope with such a loss but not impossible over time. As the grief of the loss is adjusted, one can begin to find new meaning. This does not mean, one accepts the loss as a good thing, it just means the person has incorporated this unfortunate incident into one’s life narrative and now is looking to find new ways to exist with a disability. Not just learning to make life easier through therapy, strengthening and new technology, but also seeing what other opportunities exist.
The article, “Limb Loss and Grief: 5 Coping Strategies for New Amputees” by Richard Console Jr takes a closer look at the grief of limb loss and how some can learn to cope. He states,
“Why does grief often accompany an amputation? Feelings of grief can arise from any kind of meaningful loss – and the loss of a limb certainly counts. In the case of amputation, the absent body part itself isn’t the only loss you suffer. Amputation also leads to many other kinds of losses.”
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it matches your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four certification as a grief counselor.
During grief, multiple emotions can emerge. Anger, sadness and even guilt. Guilt especially can be a harmful emotion during grief because it tortures one over the loss of a loved one. Thoughts torture an individual regarding potentially the final days. Did the person do enough, did she say something mean she regrets, or did he not give enough time while the person was alive? These thoughts can torment the soul.
Second guessing oneself in grief and finding guilt can eat at the soul. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
In addition, some individuals find guilt in things that were beyond their control. The guilt eats away and when they discuss it, they discover the guilt was unfounded. This is especially true with children and magical thinking. In many cases, children may feel responsible for the death of a loved one because they wished it or thought it. Hence guilt can be a true poison in the grieving process and the only way to weed it out is to discuss it and share it with others.
Another type of guilt in loss is survivor guilt. When experiencing a traumatic event, the survivor sometimes may feel guilty they survived or feel guilty they did not do enough to save others. In reality, there should be no guilt, but the guilt still haunts them.
The article, “Grief and Guilt: ‘I can’t believe I did that’ edition” from “Whats Your Grief” takes a closer look at guilt and grief. The article states,
“When it comes to grief and guilt, these ‘if-then’ thoughts often come up around the thing we did or didn’t do. We think if something had been different, the outcome would have been better. It is easy to imagine that the alternate reality would be the perfect outcome we wish for, instead of the reality we’re living. We look back and think things like:”
The article lists numerous what if scenarios of what if, but then looks at why we do certain things in different situations. Stress response of fight or flight and our various crisis responses provoke different responses. So in reality, we respond in a given situation and are programmed to do so. Yet, in grief, we still look back with guilt, why we did not go to the funeral, or why we did not fight longer with treatments for our loved one, or wish we would have done that one little thing to change an outcome.
We as temporal beings cannot know the final end or whether an alternate ending is any better. In fact, the same ending may have occurred regardless and we can merely torture ourselves over and over in the mind.
We need to accept the past, shed guilt and realize our mind reacts to stress and crisis differently and we cannot return to that moment. What we can hold tightly to is we do what we feel is best at that moment and that we cherish and love our loved one. Our loved ones do not wish us to torture ourselves after their death. They want us to grieve healthy and not find guilt in their death but eventual acceptance.
If of a religious mind, we know they are in a better place and will one day reunite with us. In the meantime, holding on to guilt and other toxic emotion is unhealthy whether religious or not. The memory of the person lives on in us and they would never wish for us to hold on to unfounded guilt.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it matches your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and the training for qualified professionals leads to a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
Basic loss can be dealt with through coping and proceeding through the grieving process. However, sometimes, grief can become complicated or more intense and require deeper aid and assistance. Grief therapies can help an individual through loss and depression. Grief therapies however are conducted under professional licensed counselors or psychologists. If one is only a certified grief counselor, then they cannot delve into deeper grief pathologies, however, many licensed counselors and psychologists are also certified in grief counseling and may proceed with deeper treatments for deeper pathologies.
Some losses are so intense that the mind and heart do not heal and require deeper grief therapies. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
Grief however in itself is not a pathology and these other treatments can help those dealing with basic loss if necessary. Some treatments in themselves involve cognitive responses to grief with reframing the loss or reinterpreting and others deal with deeper treatments in reviewing the loss and emotion. Therapists are able to guide someone through trauma or greater loss. Other therapies also include play therapy and art therapy for children.
The article, “Understanding Therapy for Grief and How It Can Help” from Healthline looks deeper at different grief therapies.
“It can be difficult to quantify or predict the outlook for people dealing with grief, especially since each person manages it in their own way. It’s also challenging to predict if any one treatment may work the best. Grief does not follow one particular path. Healing is unique to each individual, and the outlook for people dealing with grief looks different for each person. A therapist can play a key role in supporting the healing process by facilitating counseling sessions based on your situation.”
Again, certain therapies can only be conducted by different levels of training. Grief Counselors can usually deal with basic grief, but as grief becomes pathological or more deep therapy is needed, then higher trained professional are needed to help one through the loss. Identifying complicated grief is key.
Please also review The American Academy of Grief Counseling and its Grief Counseling Certification and see if it it matches your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four certification as a grief counselor.
In diagnosis, psychologists are aware of the differences between Bi Polar and Depression. Both are mood disorders but Bi Polar Disorder has manic highs and lows, while depression is a permanent low. However, a manic low can last so long as to disguise itself as depression. It is important for licensed professional counselors to identify these differences.
Bi Polar or Depression? Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training Program and see if it matches your academic goals
The article, “Bipolar Disorder and Depression” from Healthline looks at these differences. The article states,
“A healthcare professional will examine you and ask about your mood and medical history. They may also request blood tests to rule out a thyroid condition or other medical condition that may cause symptoms similar to depression. A psychiatrist or other mental health professional can confirm the diagnosis.”
It is important for non licensed professionals who do grief counseling not to attempt to treat depression or bi polar but to refer them to licensed professional care. Some grief counselors who are already licensed care givers, can treat a patient but those who are not, must not attempt to counsel beyond basic loss and grief. Depression and Bi Polar require a higher training and licensed position.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in grief counseling.
Collective grief in history can bring inspiration later in the forms of music and art. The symbolism found within the art and music can bring forth masterpieces that define human culture. In ways, art can immortalize grief, freezing it in time for future generations to understand.
Art is a way grief can expressed and symbolized. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
The article, “The art of processing our collective grief” by Oscar Holland looks at art and a museum in New York that looks how grief is being immortalized. He states,
“Whether portraying others’ grief or revealing their own, artists are often able tap into something universal. One need not be Christian to feel Mary’s anguish in Renaissance depictions of Christ’s crucifixion; one need not have lived through the Spanish Civil War to feel the harrowing abyss at the heart of Picasso’s “Guernica” (pictured above). The torment of Edvard Munch’s “The Scream” is clear to all.”
On a smaller scale, others can utilize art to express their grief. Artwork, writing, and music are excellent ways for the right side of the brain to process grief through symbol and expression. It can also help one understand deeper the grief they are experiencing and allow an outlet to express it.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if it meets your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
In times of crisis suicidal thinking can overtake, but it can also gradually creep into the mind of the person via depression. Understanding and identifying suicidal depression is important and can save a life.
Helping some through suicidal thoughts takes indepth training. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Program
The article, “Understanding Suicidal Depression” from Healthline explores the characteristics of suicidal depression. The article states,
“When someone has clinical depression with suicidal ideation as a symptom, Marshall says it means that they are experiencing suicidal thoughts as part of their overall health symptoms. “However, it’s important to remember the vast majority of people who are depressed do not go on to die by suicide,” she explains.”
It is important to never underestimate suicidal thoughts and to help individuals find the help and care they need if beyond one’s ability. If someone is experiencing suicidal thoughts, it is important to delve deeper into how well thought a potential plan is and also the ability to carry out that plan. In addition it is important to make a pact that if someone feels they can no longer cope to call or let you know.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professional seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
During the pandemic it has been difficult to live a normal life. With the vaccine on its way and some already receiving it, life can in some ways turn to normal, but grief and loss during these years will not be washed away with a vaccine. There is no vaccine for grief and it is part of life. It is important to deal with grief and learn to better live with it.
Unfortunately with grief, there is no vaccine and it is something we must learn to cope with. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training
The article, “There Is No Vaccine for Grief” by A.C Shilton presents an excellent story on the reality we cannot just make grief go away but instead must face it. He presents a few steps to help others deal with grief and learn to face sad emotions. He states,
“Inoculating yourself against feelings of loss may prove harder than getting a routine vaccine. “Grief is as unique as a thumbprint. What works for one person may not work for another,” said Deanna Upchurch, the director of clinical outreach services at the Providence-based hospice HopeHealth. ”
There is no quick fix for grief. During the pandemic, the fear of loss has tormented society, instead of fleeing those fears, indulge them briefly and analyze the feelings and see if there are better ways to cope with potential loss and how to deal with those we love.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training and see if it matches your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling
Miscarriages are sometimes a forgotten grief. Parents suffer greatly who lose a child due to miscarriage. It is unseen, and sometimes unknown, so the ability to find support can be difficult. Both husband and wife share in the pain but many times the born children are left in the dark regarding the lost. Children need to be explanations if a miscarriage occurs.
Discussions with a child about a miscarriage are important. Please also review AIHCP’s Child and Adolescent Grief Counseling Certification
These explanations need to be age appropriate. They also need to ensure the child knows there is no blame for the loss but that sometimes these things can happen.
The article, “How To Talk To Kids About Miscarriage” by Jessica Zucker takes a closer look and on how to discuss the loss during miscarriage to children. She states,
“Much like conversations centering around divorce or a parent separation, it’s common for children to immediately blame themselves for a pregnancy or infant loss. This is primarily due to their cognitive development, which leave them centering themselves and/or only seeing things through their perspectives. So it’s vital that throughout the conversation, and perhaps even at the start, you remind your child that they are in no way responsible for any pregnancy outcome, especially one that ends in a loss. And, that it’s not the fault of the mom either.”
Please also review The American Academy of Grief’s Grief Counseling Program as well as its Child and Adolescent Grief Counseling Certification and see if they meet your professional and academic needs. The programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
When something bad happens to a friend or something bad happens in the news, it is natural to fear that it could possibly happen to you. This uncertainty may make one focus on losing a loved one although it is unlikely it could occur. This can create extreme anxiety and create the feeling of the potential loss.
Do you worry about potential loss and grief that has not occurred? Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training Program and see if it meets your academic goals
In this fallen world, happiness is not complete. With everything gained, it will eventually be taken back. This is a reality of the world. However to become obsessed with things that probably will not occur traumatically or suddenly, can sullen the happiness one possesses in the present. The focus and fear on the future can bring grief that should not be actualized because nothing has occured.
The article, “Grief, Loss, and Intolerance of Uncertainty” from “What’s Your Grief” looks at this concept of Intolerance of Uncertainty. The article states,
“People very reasonably say to me – “The chances of that terrible thing happening are so low – why do you worry?” To which I usually respond, “Well, if it has to happen to someone, why shouldn’t it be me?” I’m not sure whether I’ve always taken such issue with the unknown, but I’m certain that being exposed to loss has exacerbated my fears. ”
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Training Program and see if it matches your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four certification as a Grief Counselor
