Support Groups can help individuals of like mind to find healing. This is especially true in Grief Support Groups. Still, like in everything, problems can occur. Certain individuals with certain tendencies can pose problems to leadership and group dynamic. The video below looks at certain issues that can arise and how a Grief Support Group Specialist can handle and defuse situations.
Please also review AIHCP’s new Grief Support Group Certified Specialist Program and see if it meets your academic and professional goals. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals looking to become Grief Support Group leaders. Those already certified as Grief Counselors can enter into the program.
Grief Support Groups are important for individuals who lack the proper support arcs at home. Many individuals do not have anyone to talk to or share their grief. It is important for groups to help others find strength in dealing with the particular loss. The video below discusses the importance of Grief Support Groups and how to become a strong group leader.
Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Support Group Leader Certification as well as AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification and see if they matches your academic and professional goals. The programs are online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certifications
Going through grief is a difficult transition. With so many erroneous philosophies surrounding grief, it can even be more difficult to navigate emotions and cope with the pain. It is important to understand how grief affects human beings and how human beings need to react to grief itself. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification Program.
Grief can be a difficult journey. Sometimes support groups can help individuals process and cope with grief in helpful ways. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Program
Many contend grief is an unnatural state, or that one must restore balance in life and forget the past. Others believe grief is in step by step stages. Others believe grief should be kept from others and never expressed. All of these ideas can lead to complications within the grieving process. Many individuals due to misinformation need external help to learn how to grieve and cope properly.
Support is key in grieving as well as Grief Counseling. The rule of thirds dictates that one third of those one knows will be indifferent to one’s loss, while another third will actually be counterproductive to the grieving process, and the final third will be helpful and compassionate. The more support one has the better they can cope with the loss but many need help. Grief Support Groups offer the aid some need to better heal.
Alan Wolfert, an expert in grief, lists ten key touchstones to grieving. These touchstones are utilized in his guide for support groups. The touchstones provide a good outline to dictate the course of the meeting outlines in helping others come to grips with loss itself. Many of the elements found in other grieving models are found in these touchstones but again the touchstones are not to serve as a chronological time line to healing but a check list to measure healing.
In this blog, we will briefly review these ten touchstones.
The first touchstone deals with opening oneself to the presence to the loss. Denial is one of the first reactions to loss. Hence it is important to open oneself to the reality of loss and acknowledge the event and start to process it. Various emotions will emerge, but the process is key in healing. It is also critical to understand the nature of grief. Grief in itself is the price of love. The two are forever interwound with each other. Understanding that grief is not temporary but a life long journey is important. Love is forever hence grief and loss of that love is forever.
The second touchstone deals with dismissing false misconceptions of grief. A support group can help others dismiss bad grieving habits and false ideas. So many false ideas about grief exist in society. Many of these false misconceptions and myths damage healing itself.
The third touchstone involves embracing the uniqueness of one’s grief. Grief is very unique. Due to this, losses vary from individual to individual. Some losses are greater than others. Other losses have greater bonds. Some losses also depend on one’s ability to cope. Secondary losses can occur which can make the primary loss even more difficult. Hence all loss is unique because each bond is unique. It is important for the bereaved to understand the unique nature of his or her personal grief and what challenges he or she will incur.
The fourth touchstone is exploring the feelings associated with loss. So many times, emotions are hidden. Some emotions are considered distasteful. It is important to accept all forms of emotions within a healthy manner. Anger and sadness should not be dismissed but embraced and properly understood within the grieving process.
Touchstone five deals with understanding the needs of mourning. This touchstone correlates with many grief theories regarding recovering. First, one must acknowledge the loss. Following this, one must embrace the emotions, remember and commemorate the deceased, develop a new relationship, find new meaning and let others help in times of sadness. These are key elements in adjusting to the particular loss and becoming whole again. One does change through grief but through proper grieving , one is able to change in a healthy way that adjusts to the loss and allows one to exist but still remember.
The sixth touchstone is understanding that grief does not make one crazy. Many individuals hold tight to older traditions, dream of the deceased, or may even see the deceased. While in grief, these types of fixations on the deceased are not pathological. Missing someone is not crazy. The manifestations of missing someone should not be dismissed as crazy. Individuals must understand that is natural for these things to occur during the grieving process.
The seventh touchstone deals with nurturing oneself. In grief, it is easy to forgot oneself. It is easy not to care for oneself or attend to things that are important to oneself. As one heals, it is important to care for oneself. It is important to try to find a smile, or beauty in things. This may be difficult, but self care should not feel guilty. Many who grieve, feel they must grieve forever or they will betray the one the love. Grief should not be a punishment but a transition.
The eighth touchstone involves reaching out to others. Many individuals see this as a sign of weakness. These individuals may hide their grief. Others may see it as a sign of weakness to ask for advice or cry before someone. As social beings, it is important to seek help when hurt. Emotional hurt is no different.
The ninth touchstone is discovering that grief is about reconciliation not resolution. There is no end to the loss itself. The loss is forever hence the separation is forever. There will be no resolution or new self void of the past. Hence it is important to understand that one must become reconciled to the loss. One must be able to accept it and live with it. This means living with it in a healthy way, but it does not mean, the pain will magically vanish. One still can at times experience the pains of loss but be completely adjusted and reconciled to the new reality.
The final touchstone is appreciation of one’s transformation. This does not mean one forgets the deceased and is happy to be changed, but means one is happy he or she experienced the grieving process and now can in a healthy way enjoy the adjustment while still remembering the deceased. The transformation shows change and growth and understanding. These are good things to be thankful for.
Wolfert’s Ten Touchstones can direct grief support groups. Please also review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification
These touchstones serve as an excellent source to guide Grief Support Meetings. They can help individuals through the maze of grief and find proper healing and transformation. It allows the bereaved to experience emotion, learn about the grieving process and have the support and tools to reconcile and transform from the loss.
If you would like to learn more about Grief Counseling, then please review AIHCP’s Grief Counseling Certification. The program is online and independent study and open to qualified professionals seeking a four year certification in Grief Counseling.
