Grief and loss equal change. The adaptation to change is the hardest thing to deal with when overcoming grief. Time is inherent with change. Hence many people can grieve over the issue of time itself. Time changes and alters things, places, people and status. One can mourn the past and fear the future or mourn their own inherent change and demise. Others realize that time pushes them further and further away from the passing of a loved one. Each new day adds to the initial separation and fear of forgetting.
Hence time can be the ultimate source of grief. The loss is time itself and the change and differences that occur over time. Individuals who are OCD or grieving or fearful of change will have a difficult time adjusting to any change. While grief over change occurs, we must remember that change is not always bad but sometimes is for the best. Good things can occur and if we live in constant fear of change, or grieve over how it used to be, then we may very well be missing the beauty of the present.
One needs to identify the beauty of the day, remember the past and cherish it, but not allow it to dominate present happiness. Loss and change can still be valid sources of grief and those losses must be dealt with but fortunately as time passes, so does the ability to adjust to loss. While we may miss the past or someone from long ago, we can still learn and grow and appreciate the present.
The article, “Mourning the Passage of Time” by Eleanor Haley of “Whats Your Grief” looks at six aspects of time and grief. She states,
“Changes can cause a person to experience losses related to death, distance, estrangement, anticipatory grief, and grief over the transformation of a person who is still present”
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